Not Sure If I Have A "problem" But It Is Problematic

 I am physically a woman but apparently acquired male hormones from the womb due to being conceived two months after the birth of my brother.

I don't think/behave like a woman and self-identify as a preadolescent gay male since I seem to be attracted to males.
I scored -115 on the online Combined Gender Identity And Transsexuality Inventory test, supposedly showing me to be a class 3 androgyne. I was told I am perfectly happy with myself and just to feel express both sides, which I do anyway,altho there seems to be little female about me.

Although I resemble a small, delicate female, in a relationship I take the male role half the time, am highly aggressive, and often act like a dominatrix .
I grit my teeth and make myself  "pass" as female but I don't identify with them, altho I have no desire to be a man or to look like one. I don't accept my woman's body and feel hostile to it, and to any "sissy" femininity traits. I have not ever successfully maintained a relationship with a man because I end up competing with him and the men allowed in my life eventually began sabotaging at my accomplishments. Sometimes I wish I had a supportive feminine typeRache to help me pursue my own goals, but don't feel attracted sexually to women.
Raell Raell
56-60, F
1 Response May 15, 2012

I am a lot like you. For me I think I have a male brain... because I usually think of things the way I seen most guys do. Even in daydreams a lot of times I see my role as a guy. I have no desire to be a man though. <br />
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In relationships I had to accept that I need a man with a more passive side in order to not "butt heads" with him all of the time. I had to redefine what I was looking for because society tells us is that we need an A-type leader dominant male, but if we are the dominant ones also that may not work out so well. Anyway I like your article and wanted to share some of my thoughts.