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I'm Slipping

I'm slipping towards anorexia i think. My brain keeps telling me not to eat... I look in the mirror, I'm way skinnier than all my friends already, but when i look at myself i want to get lighter... feel more free.
If i can control one part of myself, then maybe i can get a grip on my life..
Everything seems to be out of my control.
I am not anorexic....... yet........
I dont want to go there, but i do.
Because i feel like only my boyfriend cares about me. And my mum is so controlling that I'd like to be able to take control of myself..
I need people to talk to about this, I feel so lonely.
Illlusion Illlusion 16-17, F 4 Responses Jul 27, 2011

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:'( thats really sad........... wish i could help somehow.

I have not felt like myself for 1.5 years

Thankyou.. it really helps a lot to hear that. I've read peoples stories, and I've seen pictures online. They do scare me... But i think : I'll never end up like that... I feel so sorry for everyone who has this disease. My friends think i'm too skinny, but i love it. I've not been feeling like myself lately. Its so weird.<br />
Thanks again...

I soooo get that. And if you do feel like your slipping. GET HELP. Because once your in. your in and it's so damn hard to get out. Just go talk to someone, please. I know it may not seem bad now but you will thank me later if you talk to someone. Research anorexia and look at peoples stories. People die from this. But I am really sorry because I felt myself slipping and I didn't do anything about and now I am stuck like this. It is not fun. It's a cruel diease. If you don't chose to get help and watching people youtube video's don't scrare you then you allready are anorexic. Again, so sorry you are slipping! :( Message me any time. I am 13-15 too. Female.