I always felt I was broken, when I was younger and all the lads were talking about having sex and "getting lucky" . I was just sat there enjoying my video games. Don't get me wrong I think women are beautiful, very aesthetically pleasing to look at. And I do feel romantically attracted to them.
But if asked what would you do if you could spend one night with the most beautiful woman in the world, honestly, I'd watch a film, talk, and enjoy there company. I love intimacy, even to the point of kissing. But I dont feel the urges to jump into bed, if I were told that I could never have sex again. I wouldnt panic or crumple up in a heap. I honestly wouldnt mind.

I just dont get the sexual urges to women, even when I'm in a relationship, watching her fall asleep on my chest is much more fulfilling to me than knowing that I'd just had sex with her. I just don't see things that way, and thus, for many years I honestly thought I was broken.
AlfaCough AlfaCough
26-30, M
6 Responses Aug 31, 2014

Me too, cuddling is great. I worried for many years if I could not keep a good relationship

I'm just now coming across your post and I couldn't feel more the same. I got out of a very long relationship about 3 months ago and I kick myself for not exploring myself and my feelings earlier. I'm completely romantic with no desire for sex, and it's so hard to explain that in any way.

Same here

I've only recently accepted I am the way I am, I think I've always known, and I've been confused for years as to way I never seemed to be into sex the way my friends were. When I was kissing a guy, I would enjoy to an extent, but I never felt the urge to take it further, and I thought I was just weird and immature, but then I came across the phrase asexual about 8 months ago, and I then found this site, and at least now I know I'm not alone, and others have experienced the same thing as me.

Same here

Very interesting. I love this site. I have a family member whom I've always wondered about...been hard to tell whether he's gay or just not interested in sex...I think it's the ladder.

I didnt realise it was a thing up until a few months ago. It was difficult telling my mum, she wants grandkids.

Latter* not ladder. And, I don't need to find out what sexual preference he has. It's his life and I just want to love him.

Also I hope that person is not here to wonder about family members instead of finding out about their selves ..Not here to be gawked at or answer personal questions..

if/when you are married...these asexual feelings you have might result in a sexless marriage. if you care enough, don't let that happen.

I wish I had known that before I got married

my ex-husband was sorta asexual. he only initiated and approached me once a month. now you know that your libido is low, what will you do about it, if you care enough?

I asked for a divorce so he can have a normal life, but he refused. So I guess he accepts for now the lack of it.

I havent even begin to think. I've recently just realised I was asexual. I would explain to someone who I was marrying or even starting a relationship with. About my orientation.

that would be helpful. cuz I married my ex under the impression that sex was going to be frequent and good. sad to say I discovered it wasn't going to be that way after many years of frustration and trials

You'd have to work that out early on.

Ahhh dont worry. It'll be one of the first thing I was to tell a potential partner. I'm not one to lead anyone on.

That is purely up to them

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Amen!