I Love My Family.

Told my parents two weeks ago and told my sister today about my gender fluidity. Needless to say, much confusion on their end, and many questions and me fixing misconceptions. But in the end, everyone is totally fine with it, and my sister is even wanting to participate a little. This makes me truly happy. :)

If I were to offer any advice, it would be the following. Get your story straight in your head first. You need to speak with conviction. You know who are, but expect some questions to see if you arent just confused about yourself. My dad was saying arent you just a sensitive guy like myself? But I pointed out and said I like being called she/her when female. Its about identity, not just behavior.

Speak calmly and matter of factly. Dont get emotional or frustrated if they dont understand right away but are trying to. This isnt easily relatable after all lol.

Distinguish for them the differences between your physical sex, your gender identity, and sexual orientation. I may be gender fluid, but im certainly straight and only attracted to girls, so be sure to clarify.

And finally, let them know how this will or wont affect your relationship with them. For me, this pretty much means nothing to my guy friends and dad, because im always a guy in those settings. However, it could affect how id like to be treated with my female friends, sister and mother. But only as much as theyre comfortable with. Dont force your opposite gender on someone and demand understanding and treatment right away. Some may need time to adjust.

So that's it. Hopefully this helps and other young bigenders like myself in helping your loved ones understand you. Right now im heading into NY to shop for clothes with my female friend. :D Be yourself and be happy my friends.

Love,
Patrick/Tatianna
ViewtifulMe ViewtifulMe
26-30, T
1 Response Dec 1, 2012

So wonderful that you have such a supportive family. Now that they are aware that such fluidity exists (I believe it is at soul level), they will likely be some of your strongest allies. :-)

Yes indeed! In fact, my sister even texted me saying she's so grateful I showed trust in her and she feels a better understanding for me now. She wants to use this as a bridge for better communication between us and building a better sibling-hood going forward. I'm really happy about that. :)