I was born female, but 'female' has never described me. I knew I was different when I was 3 years old. Imagine my mothers reaction to come into the room and find her three year old leaned over a trashcan cutting at her hair with a pair of scissors. That time was just my bangs. But a year later, I cut off my pig tails and asked Santa for the G.I. Joes that my brother had, as well as a firetruck and some tonka trucks and hot wheels. My mothers reaction was to put me in the frilliest dresses she could find. I never left the house without looking like a total girl. As if that was going to magically make me enjoy it.

It has taken me until I was 22, to discover that there is actually a name for something that describes me as close as possible. I am Bigendered. It was the same as when I was told that I had a neurological disorder called Dyspraxia. I looked at the description of it, and all I could think was "Hey, that's me!". The exact same thing happened with reading about bigendered. It was an "ah ha" moment for me. It opened my eyes.

So now I am taking time to try and figure it all out. I see a lot of soul searching over the next few months. I am very thankful to have such an amazing girlfriend to support me. She identifies as trans, but has a few things keeping her from considering a transition. But she fully supports me exploring things and trying to better understand myself. :)
manniesue manniesue
22-25, T
1 Response Jan 14, 2013

Try living not knowing the way you are till your 35.5.
And your girlfriend knew for 27.5 years, and had
you find out on your own.

My girlfriend is 36, and she still is confused on gender issues. She's been dealing with it for the past 22 years.

I have been dealing with my issue for about 6 weeks.
And my girlfriend knew from day one. That's what
has me confused. Now that's some Sh%& ain't it.

I've known my entire life, I just wasn't around folks that would let me express myself, or understand. And I never thought of terms for myself until recently. Or never found them. But in all honesty I lean more towards FTM and am considering minor alterations to pass as male better.

I'm all male and would not change. It just my girly side wants
to come out. But that's just me. I wish you the best of luck.

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