Lost In Space...

Totally unfulfilled with life and don't know where to go from here. Suffering from depression & anxiety because if it. There is nothing "wrong" with my life that needs fixed. Married to my best friend for 10 years with 2 wonderful children. A good paying job in healthcare mgmt (which pays well, but can be stressful). Several very good friends I can trust. Family, who might be a little quirky & annoying, but who love me a lot. I have PLENTY to be thankful for and I AM, but I am not fulfilled. I am not inspired. I am not living a life I love.

What in the hell is wrong with me & WHY???

Honestly, I don't feel like I fit in society. I don't like our social structure. I don't like the competition, the rat race, what is deemed "important" in life. It all seems so stupid, so meaningless. I want to DUMP everything and move to a very secluded and natural place with my family and focus on creativity, introspection, love, harmony with nature, health, philosophy and spirituality. I want to remove from my life money, power, commercialism, concrete, racism, classism, waste, greed, jealousy & hate.

I feel like we are missing the big picture and wasting our lives. We go to school (and then forget most of what we learned), get a job, work 40 hours a week, enslave ourselves to bills, fill our houses full of meaningless stuff, retire, die.

But it seems impossible to break away.

Blueastral Blueastral
31-35, F
1 Response Dec 2, 2012

I have to agree, this seems to be a more common feeling among people than I ever thought.

I just have not figured out how to escape societies norm or to find a place to live free and simply survive.