Considering Celibacy At Twenty-eight

Twenty-eight years I've been married and now I am considering celibacy. Why? To help me discern the whys I am reading "Demythologizing Celibacy" by William Skudlarek.

About six years ago I chose to sleep in a different room from my wife. Her deteriorating health required the use of a CPAP machine to help her sleep. For a number of months we slept together, we and the "machine". But my sleep was growing restless. I became aware that my respiration during the night was following the rhythm of the CPAP. Once aware of this unnatural rhythm, I chose to move to a different room. Our intimate and sexual relationship did not survive, bringing much emotional struggled and pain.

My wife's health continues to deteriorate. And I see no return to shared space or intimacy. So instead of allowing this struggle and pain to control my emotions...it seams that celibacy maybe a path to new joy, a "skillful means" to new spiritual strength.



forthetimebeing forthetimebeing
51-55, M
2 Responses Sep 25, 2012

Sorry for your situation. Best wishes to your wife. It must be difficult. Speaking of difficult, don't you think denying your body a physical need like sex is so restricting? I mean, I think it's great to gain more spiritual strength, but we are made to want the physical pleasure, affection and intimacy so you feel like you would even more unhappy?

If it is your choice and you are happy with it- fine! I personally would not make this choice while I am alive and breathing.... I love life too much, especially in it's ultimate form -passion between man and woman...