Brand New

ive recently decided to become celibate. the last time i had sex was on may 25 and im still going strong. what made me come to this conclusion was simple, i have sex for all the wrong reasons, i dont feel beautiful, love or wortrhy unless im  opening my legs to random men. i have been taken advantage of way too many times to the point i was becoming a **** and if i continued down the road i will end up with a worst std the hpv and the were be nothing left of my soul, plus im in love with my best friend and thats the man i plan on be a wife to and the mother of his kids, the next time i have sex i want it to be with him and i want it to mean something more then just sex. sex is very much a physical     but    ifts with the wrong or right person it takes on a whole new meaning. until i can look in the mirror and say im beautiful and im worthy im not opening my legs to no one
roulette roulette
22-25, F
3 Responses Aug 9, 2007

i recently broke my celibate. i dont so much regret but still i didnt get the fulfillment i was really fiening for but, i got my quick pleasure. i havent been held or touch in so long. i was going nuts. i do what i can to get affection, no matter how false the pretense is

I know what you mean but it only makes you lonlier.

amen, i feel the same way. u realize you're shortchanging yourself and it's not a good feeling.u deserve more and i've come to feel that it's not that hard to hold out til u get what you're looking for. it's no harder than putting up with the bs and feeling unfulfilled.

Roulette, sound like you are coming into the age of wisdom. Sensing that just the flesh is truly not what will satisify you in the long run. You are entering into knowing that the spirit also in an essential part of the whole package. Sex is a gift from God, to know and enjoy it, in its fullness should be your goal. Just sex is like taking the conterfit bill, you lose in the long run. Kudo's! know your full worth, know who you are, and stand in integrity. It's can have it's moments of testing, but sometimes just standing will get you through the battle. Been celebite most of my life, won't take less then the whole package, and don't you cheat yourself either.