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Help My Friend Choose

am writing this story for a friend who isen't on this site but she needs to know what people think and what they feel is her best choice to make please help

My friend still lives at home she isent old enough to leave as an adult yet but her step dad is abusive to her mother and scares her and her sister she dreams he is going to kill there mom when she talks to her mom about it her mother always claims to be to busy and when she tries to get her mom to talk to her or be there for her on other things she isent she has said her mom doesent seem to care about her and even takes the step dads side over her daughters sides on everything and defends him over them that she doesent care if they leave or not all she tells them is that running away is dangerous now she has met a guy who she really likes and who really likes her she wants to run away to him and be with him but he lives in another country from her and she doesent know if it would be a good thing or not he can take care of her he only wants what is best for her i know there are guys out there who arent what they seem but i know this guy and he is the real thing he only wants to be with her and to make her happy and protect her and he cant do that in the situation they are in right now but her leaving could mean trouble but she hates her life at home now and cant stay with any one else for a longer time then a few days and she feels that the abuse is only getting worse and sooner or later he will hurt or kill the mom and it will be her and her sister at his mercy she wants to leave before then can you please post what you think her best path to choose is
Mysteriousestranger Mysteriousestranger 26-30, M 3 Responses Apr 8, 2012

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The thing is that the mother may have her own problems. I cant imagine she would want to live with an abusive husband. If she agreed with your opinions, then she may be too afraid to do anything about it or need him for her mental stability. She may be fighting her own struggle, or may rely on his income, maybe your friend and her little sister will end up on the streets if she gets divorced. I think your friend should go easy before blaming her mother.

There is a huge leap from being abusive or a bad father to being a murderer, it would certainly help your friend if you reassured her that he wont kill her mum.

Running away is often a pleasant idea but will have consequences, for starters she isn't old enough and probably has some sort of school or education to attend to, which is very important for her future, then there is also the fact that she would be leaving her little sister all alone.



Im afraid that i don't have any solutions to help you, sorry, i just hope that your friend thinks carefully before making a drastic decision.

Although running away with 'the guy' seems like a good idea, they will almost certainly break-up at some time for whatever reason, and she would have thrown away everything to be with him, and be left with nothing in a foreign country. I recommend contacting authorities, (doctors for a therapist, or police) and let her talk to them about it.
I dont know much about it but emancipation is an option.

honestly. she needs to protect herself.... depend on NO ONE. She needs to go to the police over and over. she needs to stay away from her mother and step dad as much as possible. maybe an aunt or grandma or cousin will let her stay with them. if anyone refuses then she needs to go to a homeless shelter for a while. she needs to scream for help to everyone.... the squeaky wheel gets the oil. She needs to refuse to let her self go home and be in harms way.

some religious groups it doesnt work like that with like hers the family wont take her side no matter what and depending on the place the law wont either cause its going agianst the religious groups and they have seperate rights in some places

now before any 1 asks i do know both of these people as friends so the guy really is a great guy and wants to take care of her and be there for her and the issues with her step dad even though she called the police once arent getting better cause her mom wont do anything about it to help her daughter and foster care is a nightmare i know ive been through it