i see a happy family, you know, wife/ man playing with his kids.... i cry inside.... why decorate for xmas?
gotta buy all my freinds and familys kids a preasent... don't wanna be there when they open them... why's that fun for me? happy for them and their beutiful them all.... even worse is when they ask me when i'm gonna have a kid...i gotta act like i don't want one or i don't have time or whatever.... inside i'm crying.... only thing i ever wanted... wish i could tell them to shut the f#$k up or punch them in the friggin face... cant.. they mean well... just asking a normal question to a normal person... they think.......mean it outta love or making conversation... not trying to hurt me..........................................

nothing could hurt me worse
allenlast allenlast
41-45, M
5 Responses Dec 5, 2011

Hello! I really appreciate how you are feeling. To ache for belonging and not finding it is truly an agony. But you don't need to have biological babies to have children! You can look around for someone who has no parent or a dysfunctional relationship with a parent and become a parent figure to him/her!
I have had a bad/non existing relationship with my biological father and have always wanted to experience a healthy father-daughter relationship. If I could have found a father figure at ANY age I would have felt much more bonding to him than I have ever felt to my biological dad! So blood really doesn't matter! You could become someone really important and loved in someone else's life.
In my quest I came across so many people hurting either for never having kids or parents or siblings or friends so I thought of making a facebook page where people looking for family bonds outside their biological families can connect, talk and maybe some will find what they were looking for in one another! Please check it out. It is still brand new.

I would love to adopt but my husband's record isn't great. He has never had a felony, though. Is that the only thing they look for? I just wonder how strict adoption agencies really are. I mean, do you have to be Mother Theresa, or what?

can't have kids.. felons can't be foster parents....tried that.... thanx for the reply

cant have kids and can't adopt, ***** don't swim right and single men with no money and a felony (20 years ago) aren't the the kind of candidates they're looking for...<br />
thanx for replying.. helps me just getting it out

I know you've probably heard this a thousand times to adopt. But their truly are kids out there that need someone to guide them. if not adoption a role model someone to show they care and are there. You could probably if adoption is too quick be a foster parent. I do hope someday you have kids, your heart seems good. And your guy so you can have kids until your i don't know 90.