Very Lost And Very Insicure

I remember when i was a kid i grew up fast had to mom was very poor single mother and i did yard sales trow trash anything to make a dollar to feed my Mother.i was molested by my school treacher by a doctor and beaten up by the school principal i grew up fast hating God if he existed i was athiest almost all my life anyways. i Victor decided in high school to look for a better paying Job to feed my family mom sister i ran into the wrong people at the right time so i started drug and weapons sales my firts pay was rufly $20,000 i liked the money and wanted more so i became a huge drug Lord in california among other states and countries i made more and more and more bought houses expensive cars women ect ect ect trips around the world but i was empty so in 2008 i decided to comit suicide i was extemely rich very and i had everything the american dream can dream it self but i was i killed my self died for 30 min no joke and thats where i meet Jesus face to face and i was like aweeee i dint know u existed he gave me a sec chance i was brought back to life i went home after a few days i was alone in my house and i heard a voice saying I love you it was his same voice i heard coming from his mouth wow..I was invited to a christian church for the first time in my life i went so they where talking about suicide and if u kill ur self u go strait down to hell i ran out of church so like a month pass and i was invited again this time they stared talking about agape love and i needed that so i heard about Jesus Christ and what he did on the CROSS for me and how i put him there cause of my sins so being spaniard as i am i tought i was goin to heaven for i tought Jesus was spanish as well cause my mom made me watch movies in spanish about Jesus so i heard it in spanish so i said this man is spaniard lol...i was wrong when i heard that he was Jewish i was like God u are a liar (not racist) i got up and ran before i got to the door a hand hit me behind my knees and droped down and i started cursing at God and i heard him say "worship me i am your God"I then started bledding my mouth and nose cursing at him people where praying over me over 200 people at church pastor said Jesus is the way brother out Loud demonds release him so i got on my knees again and acepted Jesus as my lord and saviour for the first time in my life i was in peace at that moment love came in to my heart forgiveness and many more i walked out church looked at my car trew the keys away and walked home i sold everything i had and the last penny i gave it away it was hard at first but God asked me to loose my self if i wanted to find him....its like I was born to die and i did die to find Jesus the real God has restored my life in so many ways im so grateful that i am now a Christian non denominational....thank you for reading my story God bless you all...Phil 4:13 i can do anything trew Christ who gives me strenght
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5 Responses Dec 6, 2012

We can indeed do all things through Christ who strengthens us!

You died a broken man and came back to life in Christ, it's wonderful the way God works to restore hope.

I am well thank you.

yes I would, love your photo, looks like you have light inside you

Thanks for posting this important part of your life.
God drew u to himself by speaking to you in that way and not many people have that experience. You had a hard and very difficult life but he turns all things around for our good and you can expect a good life now and much happiness in Jesus.
So glad you back with us again and hope you feeling healthy again. Hugs

I admire your strength, and courage to talk about it. And what a turn you have made in
your life. I admire you for that. What a life you have lead. I am here for you when you want to talk.