Too True! Lol

Dear Employees,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of
economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice
and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Management.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much **** (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of **** it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough ****, please bring to the attention of your Supervisor.They have been trained to give you all the **** you can handle.

 The Management
KinkyFlower KinkyFlower
31-35, F
6 Responses Mar 13, 2009

Hey Flower - do you know the origin of this sarcastic joke?

Hey Flower - do you know the origin of this sarcastic joke?

yes you should definitely pay more attention now Marcus! don't want that happening to you!! lol

Very well done! I was wondering what all those gosh-darned-fangled acronyms meant...I better go hide my walking stick, lest I be RAPED..LOL

yes VendettA12, sometimes they are lol

Very nice. Sometimes forwards are worth reading.