Opposites Detract- Please Advise
I have been married to my second husband for 2 1/2 years. We met on e-harmony and married 5 months to the day of our first date. At first it seemed that we were well matched and perfectly balanced. Nowadays it seems that what we thought was a good balance is actually completely incompatible. My husband is very structured. He finds freedom through strict routine, a spotless house and rigid authority over myself and my two children from a previous marriage. I am a free-spirit. I thrive on spontaneity. I'm not a pig but a litter clutter doesn't make me uncomfortable. My sons are good boys...they're also 14 and 12 years old. They roll their eyes a lot, they talk back and they love to bicker with each other. Usually they get along famously and they are very helpful...they just ***** along the way :o) We have a son together, he'll be one on Saturday. He's precious and light of ALL our lives. Unfortunately my husband treats the baby like like a king and the other two boys like nuisances. I am tired of my loyalty for my children being pitted against my loyalty to my husband. I love my husband as a person but in the last year our relationship has deteriorated to the point that I'm not quite sure what we're doing here. My husband has his own bedroom and the last time I tried to kiss him on the mouth he turned his head away. We haven't had sex since before Christmas. He says he wants to work on our friendship. I told him I had male friends before I met him and would like to work on our marriage. He didn't respond. I can't make this marriage work on my own and now I am afraid to initiate any kind of intimacy. There is no flirting, no flirtatious teasing, no holding hands...I feel awkward just brushing up against him in a tight space! Has anyone been here before and it worked? Has anyone been here before at all? Help! I'm so lonely!