Torn.There is way to much to be said about my relationship. We've been together two years now. I was so blinded by the "in love high" that many of us experience when we first meet that special person. I connected with him, and went with the flow. I ended up here. In some cases, a lot has changed, in others nothing at all. I know i'm quite attached to him, some say being with him may just be habit by now. I won't know until I leave him, but I'm too scared to find out. I don't want to keep waiting and dragging it out, but I can't bring myself to leave him, regardless of how angry I get at the time. Things are so much worse than anyone could understand
I know I'm the type of woman that just attracts lost souls, and I always attempt to fix what I know I cannot. I just don't seem to want to give up, and I feel like everyone deserves love, even if they sometime don't know how to show love back. Some were never showed love, and never learned how to love. Some were never held or played with as a baby, never felt important or special, or worth anything. These things are what causes many to grow into dis functional adults, who are now incapable of feeling, or giving love or dealing with emotions. This of course causes problems in a relationship. I'm not perfect, and a lot of the time I lose my patients and get angry, but I pour my heart and soul out to him, trying to build him up to be the best he can be, and to be successful in this world, but I'm beginning to see, if he doesn't love himself, my loving him wont make a difference.Having the personality type I do makes me an absolute sucker in some ways, because I just don't have it in me to break his heart, he is also so fragile, and in need of serious help. I do believe one day I will get out of this situation, but until then, i'm just confused, and letting things be.