Friends Or More????


I met this guy (Paul) over 3 years ago on a skiing holiday in Italy. I only met him on the last night so no romantic involvement whatsoever but we chatted in a club and he asked to meet him the next day for lunch - I was amazed when he was there to meet me - just thought it was a line. He gave me his email and we kept in touch.

At first he was going out with someone - I had been through a really bad break up (have not gone out with anyone else since - that's how badly I took it!!!! - that's over 6 years ago). Anyway at first with this guy we only kept in touch my email and phone. This was the way for over a year - then I think we both started to wonder about in other in a more romantic way - (well a more physical way). We met up after about 1 and a half years - both very nervous - he was still with his girlfriend - I was single. Lets just say there was lot of activity of a sexual nature that weekend - the tension had built up and built up over a year and a half.

Anyway since all this - (by the way he lives in England and I live in Ireland) we see each other every few months - sometimes 6 month gaps, sometimes 2 month gaps etc. & that's the way its been for 3.5 years.

He's divorced (young only 33) and has a 12 year old daughter - he said from the first time I met him he doesn't want children and will never marry again.

This guy is now without a doubt my best friend.

But of course I'm a girl I get the whole physical thing confused for affection/romance. I do genuinely believe he cares for me - he insists he does and that I am very special to him. He claims that it is getting harder for him whenever we see each other as he misses me really badly when I go home or he goes back that he doesn't really want to be physical anymore. Usually its the girl whos that way. The way I see it I see him so infrequently that I want to make the most of our time together in every way.

He still wants us to see each other all the time - is currently talking about making a trip to see me.

I think maybe this is because I told him I really do need to forget about us in a romantic way and find someone for me. - think he might be a bit jealous.

I do believe he is not using me as he is in touch all the time not just sporadically - we talk every day sometimes so are genuinely good friends.

Maybe he's just gone off me - but then why would he still want to visit and stay in touch.

Maybe he just wants to be friends without the complication of the physical side - yet he insists we sleep in the same bed as he likes to cuddle etc  

Am I fooling myself or is he genuine.

I care a lot for him - and miss him a lot. He really is my best friend in life I think and has been there for me in really down times I've had.

He's very genuine and we love just spending time together -

what do I do!!!!!!

I want someone all for me!!!


WishIwasHappy WishIwasHappy
36-40, F
Jun 29, 2007