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Its All Gone

After 14 years of marriage, the fire is gone. During the last 2, my wife has had no interest in having anything to do with me.No affection.. no kissing.. no hugging. The only conversation is about the welfare of my son or our 2 dogs. So its very disconcerning to know my pets achieve a higher level of importance in my household. It' s not an abusive or hostile setting, just very lonely. I take great care in keeping the house nice and preparing meals when my schedule allows me too. I not really sure what happened but i think the love is gone and a divorce would be a emotional disaster for my son. Oh how i miss the smell of a females hair while lying next to her! The sweet taste of a simple kiss or just the simple pleasure of touching soft skin. It's all getting very depressing knowing your not needed or wanted anymore. Even the daily texts of how your day is going have long stopped. The daily emotional lonelines is grinding me down.Not sure how much longer i can take this.
clamenza clamenza 41-45, M 8 Responses Nov 2, 2012

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Mmmm...it sounds to me that your problem isn't just physical it's emotional. That makes things much messier because if you find what you need outside the marriage, you'll probably be in the love with the other woman, which will lead you to want to be with her, etc. That will lead to divorce. Men who cheat just for sex, who have an otherwise loving relationship with their wives, are the ones who manage to cheat successfully without destroying their homes. That doesn't sound like your situation. I'm sorry.

This story is very sad. I feel for you. Bless your heart.

touch her, hug her, kiss her...she is yours isn't she! Don't care she want it or not...just blast her!

I have to admit, I would be curious to see the result of this approach. There is always the crazy off chance that the woman is reluctant because she feels unloved. Who knows?

My opinion is that therapy may be your only hope and to discount that at the risk of a 14 year marriage is sad.

Marriage is not only about sexual gratification it's more den tat u have to be by her side during ups n downs have a talk wit her tell her how her attitude is killing u n ask her y has she become cold I believe tat'll help ur marriage

have you both sought professional help? Or suggested it?

No not at all. My gut feeling tells me its beyond that. Thanks for the concern though.

I don't understand why we need to go through this...it is painful and even if we try to think straight in keeping the family, the loneliness and sadness that we go feel makes us wonder if getting out of the relationship (which we know would devastate our kids) would ease the pain

Because were human.It's are nature to sacrafice and suffer for our children.

That is a shame. many in this group, if not all have shared the same. I assume you have tried communication? maybe send her a text each day asking how her day is? maybe surprise her with flowers again, IDK. We all understand your situation. Good luck.

Thanks for your concern. Its very confusing to know what to do.