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I Am Curious About Polygamy

The Issue of Polygamy

By: cherryalakei
Written on May 18th, 2008

 It is a touchy subject for most, but for some who are, it is all they know.

I'm the kind of person.. that theres someone out there for you.I just know that. ive never dated more than one person at once, so sure to most people when i say  i read Carolyn Jessop's "Escape" and told them it was about her escape from a polygamist cult... i was looked at strangely by my more christian  family members.

But The thing about polygamy that intrigued me initially was "modern polygamy".

the kind you see in Big Love, or hear about outside communities and compounds.
where a man has 2 wives, and takes care of both of them and has a good job to do so.
the woman work, take care of the kids, and of course see their husband when they can. and often see each other. sister wives.
sister wives intrigued me. but what i felt was missing from this picture, was if men could engage in plural unions,  why couldnt women?

Why couldnt women have the choice to marry more than one man? and if so who would be the financial supporter? she or her husbands?  or would it be a hiearchy- 1st,2nd,etc.

Ive often refered to my ex boyfriend, as my boyfriend's "brother husband".  we dont see him ever, but he cares about me alot. he and my boyfriend have  had their problems, but they generally get along.
most men complain when they are married they dont go out like their single friends do.
sister wives for women eliminate this problem, wouldnt it be the same for men?
 

allthough it seems more modern polygamy is not as publicised as  "cult polygamy" these days with the recent raid of the texas compound, and the Yearning for Zion Ranch,which was under  control by "prophet" Warren Jeffs.
 

I dont claim to be a polygamist,  though the topic seems very intriguing to me.
Though this is the first time I have ever written about it.

By: cherryalakei
Age: 22-25 , Female
1,511 people have read this story

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    Joesblue
    Joesblue

    I think Cherry has made many interesting statements that I see could be a + in marriage .Having a sister Wife just to have someone safe to confide in that wont take advantage of your situation .I have seen many married women confide in a "female friend" Then the friend ends up with her husband .

    As for more than one man I could see how this could work but as for both you would have to find someone who is not jealous

    May 23, 2008
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    NazarenePrincess
    NazarenePrincess

    I can't comment on other ppl's lifestyles but in Islam there is no heirarchy between the spouses. The husband is the head of household and financially responsible for all the material need of all the homes. He is also responsible for the education and religious instruction of all the children. Too often I think that when ppl think polygamy they think warren jeffs, but in the muslim world, heads of state, and reputable business men have plural wives. My husband's uncle has three, and I am one of two.



    To me, polyandry doesn't make sense. although its doable IF you live in the west and IF you have the financial means. But, for the majority of the world, even christian africa, polygamy is the accepted practice. My mother's fiance has three wives already and he is the deacon of his church.

    May 20, 2008
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    dreamgyrl360
    dreamgyrl360

    The act of a woman having more than one husband is polyandry.

    While there are some that do it, and while there are some tribes that do it, I don't ever see it as a logical lifestyle.

    And, from a biblical viewpoint, it is forbidden. Adultery is typically mentioned in reference to the female in the relationship when you look at the Bible verses concerning thus (and if your Bible says otherwise, I suggest looking into the Strong's Concordance for more information on that).



    In past times, when there would be a shortage of woman in certain tribes, a woman would marry a man and kind of marry his brothers, too.



    My issues with this type of lifestyle is the following:



    1. When she has her cycle every 28 days, all men are left out (less'n your into that sorta thing!).

    2. When she gets pregnant, there is question as to who the father of the child is. Since it will belong to one man and not the other, one man will be disenfranchised. In a polygynous relationship, if one woman is pregnant, and the other wants to be, essentially, she could get pregnant too and all are getting what they want.

    3. If the woman is pregnant, at the time of the birth when she's off limits (for healing purposes) all men are disenfranchised.

    4. A woman stops being able to have children around the age of 50. Men can continue to have children well into their 70s (heavens! Ask Larry King lol). No matter how many husbands you add to the relationship, no other children will be born to the family. In a polygynous family, if one wife is above child bearing age, you can add another wife and she can have children. And once she can no longer do it, then you can add another wife, if the family wants more children... and so on and so forth.



    Because of all these things, polyandry does not seem to me to be a viable family unit.

    But I DO know people that do it. *shrugs*



    It's always good to question. *smirks* We have to question or else these men will pull the wool over our eyes lol.

    May 19, 2008
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