Im a Christian Woman In Love With a Married Man
I am dating a married man........that is the frst time I have said it, printed it or even admitted it. My story is long...so please be patient, and please give me feedback.
I met him at work, he was my boss. Nothing out of the ordinary at first, I am a dedicated worker and do my job well so that is where my focus was. I am a woman who has always worked in the automotive service industry so working with men is what I have always done. My boss and I could joke about work, we talked about kids, sports all the normal things. I have been divorced due to domestic violence an vowed to never try again. we talked about this from time to time.
His wife would call and was always very mean to me, little did I know she was very upset he was working with a woman. They had been havin gproblems for about 3 years and he had told her he wanted a divorce at some point. She asked him to go to counseling, he did, he even went to the dr. because she thought he was just depressed. Anyway, we talked about these things at work. My advice was God can fix anything, but you need to look for Gods will not just follow your own heart.
He ended up being transfered to a location an hour away,,,,,then I realized how much I missed him. We occasionally talked but not much. He called me one day and told me he moved out and t was finally done after 19 years. He was ok, but worried how the kids were going to be during the process ahead of him. I gave him advice on how to deal with kids emotions through a divorce.
About a month went by and he called and asked me out to a movie, I said yes without even thinking.
There starts the first of my guilt.
I am a christian woman, saved and forgiven by Jesus. I know how Jesus feels about adultry and I knew with him just starting the divorce, this was adultry. I went anyway.....we laughed. I cant tell you how much we think alike, have in common, love kids, kids sports, kids laughter......Over the next few weeks I was falling in love.
His soon to be ex wfe knows about me, she has almost become stalkerish, she uses her kids terribly, the older kids almost never talk to their mom because of her behavior. Now she has started a ton of blogs about her husband whos in a midlife crisis so he left her for a younger woman. It's just not true......it's been almost 7 months and statstics show most "SEX affairs" fzzle out after about 4 months. He has been sick and in the hospital 4 times, he had a job change so was unemployed for a few weeks and I never left his side.
She blogged that she doesnt know why I stay around with him wth the issues that we have had with his health. I love him....thats what you do when you want a lfe with some one. I know he loves me...by the way he looks at me, the way he helps even when I dont ask, he wears my favorite color, he prays with me, we have asked God for forgiveness of our weakness in this. We know Jesus saves, we know sn is forgiven.....but we both struggle with our love being wrong when neither of us have ever wanted to be with someone so much.
He lives over an hour away, and while he was looking for a job we prayed that whatever Gods will was God would just provide a job even if it meant we saw each other less. Well he got a call from a business here locally near me that he didnt apply at. They said they heard he was looking and would love to have him as part of their management team. SO now he works here....he commutes and it is wonderful, we get to see ech other everyday and we are planning for our future together.
His ex now is getting ther oldest daughter upset regularly, by crying, havng meltdowns and doing just immature things, so he gets these phone calls from his daughter....that sometimes she loves her dad and yet then she tells him how horrbile he s for doing this to her mother.
I am amazed at this blog the ex follows....its led by a man who says he was in a midlife crisis so he knows husbands will go back eventually no matter what. These poor woman following him are being misled. He tells them even if husbands remarry to wait they always go back to the first wife.?????
Last time I checked divorce didnt happen because one person is in crisis....its two people who dont love each other, or care to.
God does not condone divorce I know this, but he does promise happiness from hurt. Once he forgives someone its gone, he doesnt hold onto it.
More than just using the word love, I admire him, he s my best friend I laugh with, I cry with....he knows all my thoughts and feelings in this. We talk sooo much about how to help his children through this, even when there mom is holding them back.
SO I need realtionship advice, and advice about my relationship with Christ..........