Is This a New Start?
Many of you read my story, "I'm Drawn To Married Men Like a Bad Habit" and will know of what I speak. Within, I detailed my penchant for married men. I finally realize that meeting married men just isn't my bad luck. I've finally concluded that my attraction to married men is evidence of me not wanting to become too involved or vulnerable. See, with a married man, there's really no wondering. HE'S NOT MINE. I guess for a long time, this was easier for me. Within my last story, I spoke of a new married man I reconnected with. From the date of our reconnection, I gave myself till October 2nd to deal with him. He told me he was going to leave his wife and I told him it had to be done by then or I was leaving. Today is September 19th and today, I told him we could no longer talk until he is divorced. He told me he loved me and AGREED although it was going to hurt, that it was the right thing to do. I told him he was never going to leave despite his claims and emotions, HE TOLD ME HE STILL WILL. He probably won't and I told him this. I told him that he's going to talk about leaving forever and before he knows, it will be another 5 years. Anyways, I miss him but know it’s for the best. As they say, if it’s meant to be, it will be. I also am realizing it to be extremely peculiar that I only fall in love with the unavailable ones. Maybe this is because I'm not really ready for a "real" grown up relationship! C'mon, what is the likelihood that I'd only fall in love with married ones and be pretty much disgusted by all the available ones? THIS IS NOT COINCIDENTAL! This marks a new chapter in my life and I can officially remove myself from the "I'm dating a married man" club.