I Am 24, He Is 50.....this Is New

I met a man online & now we've gone on a few dates. Looking at his photos, and they way he wrote messages to me, he seemed older. He was the 3rd person I met from online, and when he strolled into the restaurant, he was older, but it was him. He was still handsome. I did some online research and found he was much older than he stated in his profile, but I was still charmed. Since he was local in town for business, I stayed at his hotel with him. And now its been a few weeks in, and I've slept with him a few times, as he has come back into town after I dropped him off at the airport. He never makes me do anything I don't want, and if anyone has benefitted the most in bed, it's been me, without having to reciprocate things like oral. And he is very well endowed- the largest I've seen in my life yet.

I am at ease talking to him about life, going running, watching sunsets, drinking wine, dining, and just being together. He takes care of me and makes sure I have everything I need when I am staying with him. Glass of wine to the room, sure? He has shelled out an awful lot for me from $30 valet parking a day, $40 breakfast pastries, etc. , but no material items, which is fine by me. I love his sweet kisses, and appreciation for me. He pays for everything but this isn't a sugar daddy relationship, which I have elsewhere.

My first concerns...what will my parents think? He is a few years younger than my father and probably has more in common with them. How do my girlfriends relate to me? Or my extended family? Basically seeing me with an older man, they must know we are having sex. I'm sure people will think I am some sort of gold digger when I walk through the hotel with him, especially because it's a high-caliber resort in Southern California.

What about children? He has an adopted son in the Middle East, and is a white businessman who has the freedom to do what he pleases. He has lived differently in that he has not settled down, but married once. If I have a child at 30, he will be 56. When our child goes to college at 18, I will be 48 while my husband is 74.

I am struggling to decide if this is something I want to pursue or not. I find it semi-embarrasing to listen to the music I do as it's probably noise to him, though he knows I do. I am very broad-minded and college-graduated, but the thought of reading my Cosmopolitans or Marie Clares seems to make me feel juvenile. He hasn't been exposed to these aspects, but they are my thoughts.

Anyone been in a similar situation or have advice?
Nicoletta25 Nicoletta25
22-25, F
4 Responses Dec 12, 2012

how is it going so far?

I'm 20 years older than my woman , it has it's down side like being a bit embarrassing sometimes , I'm attracted to women my own age as well but it is nice to be rollicking with a younger woman , and from her point of view I treat her a lot better than guys her age

I can absolutely relate to you--in fact, I am also 24, and the man I am seeing is 50. I am also experiencing the same apprehension, ambivalence, and excitement that comes from a rather unconventional relationship, and have been wanting someone to talk with who understands my situation. I am sorry that I do not have any concrete advice to give to you, but I am new to this type of relationship as well. Perhaps we could further discuss the matter elsewhere? I usually shy away from posting comments in public forums, but when I read your story and saw how strikingly similar it was to mine, I couldn't help but respond.

I would love to talk to you about it, since it's a subject I feel I can't talk to anyone about seriously. I would have to agree in your choice of describing the situation as ambivalent- it is in every aspect! I have not told my parents or close friends about him. When I talk to my friends, I just make it casual-sounding and avoid the age question, though I have lied to others about it, making him younger because it sounds better. Feel free to message me:)

I'm 43 and I'm at the point where the only girls I seem to look at or are attracted to are girls in their 20's.... something about younger girls.... the smoothness of their skin... the energy they have... the young sexuality they exude..... sooooo nice