I Am So Alone and Depressed

I used to be a happy person but since i was 11..i started not to hang out with my friends. That's when i first got my period..i felt uncomfortable going out,i was really scared that i got my period,i even stopped studying just because of that. I know,it's pretty weird. But that's me..i'm a weirdo. Since then,i no longer have friends.

I'm really shy and quiet person since i was a kid..especially in school. I don't talk a lot. My classmates described me as shy,quiet and weird. I just stay at home,i don't know how to talk to people face to face,i tend to hide my true feelings,i'm NOT sociable..that's why i'm here cause i feel more comfortable expressing my feelings and thoughts.

I do really miss my childhood days,cause i used to play outside, having friends,playmates i was so happy and wasn't having problems. It's such a great childhood. And how i wish i could turn back the time.

My parents encourage me to go outside and find new friends,but i can't..i don't how. I have mixed feelings now,i'm lonely,depressed,angry and confused. I feel so alone,i always cry at night cause that's the only way i can let the sadness & pain out. I am so sick and tired of feeling like this. I wish i had someone who i can share my feelings with,who's a crying shoulder. But there's no one. I always want to scream but i can't. I sometimes feeling suicidal but i can't do it.

I am sooo depressed and i envy the people who have the opposite situation and i envy the people who have someone who's always be there for them.

darkmood darkmood
18-21, F
46 Responses May 23, 2007

You seem to be better now, I doubt. I also tend to live my life within myself. When one asks what I'm doing, the answer is just staying at home. No one knows about my personal life, where I live and so one, and for some who I told don't bother to get it--well, no differences. <br />
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Surely it makes me depressed at night and day when I have no homework or work to do. I now then kind of living two lives at the same time. My school life and my life with no one. A friend said I was the one who never let anyone in. It's true! <br />
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The best way I found is to write it down, vent it out when you have no one you trust enough to listen. But don't lose faith. Once you found the one who can tear your wall down ;)

Hey I am 23 and I am alone and depressed. I know how you feel I am in it right now trust in god that things will get better.

I am the same, if yu need a friend or someone to talk to add me on facebook or email me rubyrosy@live.co.uk

I am the same, if you need to talk to someone who totally understands where your coming from add me on facebook or email me rubyrosy@live.co.uk

I think each one of us go through a phase of feeling depressed, lonely, anti-social and just feeling sick of things around you. <br />
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People see me as really sociable- people person, center of attraction- truth be told, I see myself as introvert and boring. There have been a lot of times I let an opportunity pass just because I chose to be at home, I didn't want to exert the effort of going out and meeting new people over again. Go through small talk and all that. But then- who's always - I mean always at their best sociable self? I'd say you're being a hypocrite if you say you are. But I deal with it- I try to resist the urge of being a couch potato and go out of my way to do things different. Because I don't- then nothing will change. I can complain all day and just be depressed. So I say, just take baby steps, <br />
go out- try to do more and explore. Easier to say than doing it but hey, there's no other way of doing it but that.<br />
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And if I may suggest a site for you to deal with "depression"naturally, visit www.WeeklyReviewExpert.com because like I said,I through a personal struggle with myself too and I want for others to be able to get the same kind of help as well. Check it out.

I am exactly like you<br />
well....you know those rich but lonely girls you see in tv?<br />
the ones that only have friends for their money?<br />
im sort of like that when i was younger...like 8-12 yrs old <br />
then i transferred to a completely diff school...a rich school <br />
so i got even lonelier and was quiet and shy all the time <br />
(not that i wasnt before....im like that wen around pple i dont know....and i still am)<br />
then i tried talking to a girl that seemed to be on the same level as me<br />
she was also quiet and shy and we were always together after that....<br />
everything started there....from then on i started talking to other people<br />
and even the popular kids at school<br />
ok well...what i did was....<br />
i just tried to listen and observe what they do and say <br />
and try to relate <br />
before i never really went out...ive never been to a cinema till i was 13<br />
so it was really hard for me to fit in the students<br />
so i started...well u can call it researching....and tried to keep up with their pace. I was always left out before because i never knew what they always talked about so i tried my best to learn about these things<br />
and until now....im still running to get to where they are<br />
i dunno is this long comment helped but it looks like a story now :D

I had a 3 year period with no friends and I felt exactly like you. It was from my 8th grade year to my 11th grade year of school. I finally met some awesome friends at church and I am still friends with them now...over ten years later. They and God have helped me alot. But I still am lonely sometimes. I'm married and have a baby now. I never thought I would be where I am today. I would talk to your parents or maybe a counselor. Things can turn around. Don't make a rash decision. Hug :>) I hope you feel better soon.

demarleaf, Holding things in is not good and can cause health issues. I know, I've been there. Have you tried to talk to the counselors at school? Or anyone else with an understanding of how difficult it is to be a middle child? I urge you to talk to someone. Life is too short to waste time being miserable. When you go into that quiet room, why don't you try meditating to calm yourself. Or listen to some calming music. Some meditation tapes are very relaxing just to hear. There are some with nature sounds like the ocean, or birds singing. <br />
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This is a good suggestion for anyone who finds themselves overwhelmed with life. Take time out of your day to just sit and take a few slow deep breaths. When you breath in try to imagine you are inhaling positive energy. Picture it as a clean white light if you can. Hold your breath for a few seconds. while you are doing that imagine all that clean white light and air traveling to every part of your body. Now exhale SLOWLY through your mouth and imagine that you are releasing all the negative energy from your body. Feel yourself relaxing. Some people imagine a gray or smokey breath leaving their bodies. It is gray because you are releasing all the icky negative thoughts and feelings you had inside. Just do this 3 or 4 times. Each time feel your body rejuvenating itself with fresh clean thoughts and feelings.<br />
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If you don't understand what I am talking about, please feel free to private message me. I will try and explain it better.<br />
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Inhale peace, joy and happiness and exhale all bad thoughts or feelings. I hope this helps some of you.<br />
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Happy thoughts to all<br />

I am in that place at this very moment. I am 14 and i have been experiencing this for 4 years. I cry in bed sometimes, when I have had a bad day i just want to scream and cry but im a middle child and I am surrounded by people all the time and I feel stupid crying so i bottle it up and wait until my anger just bursts out. I can sometimes end up hitting my sister or slamming a day or shouting at my best friend and having arguments with them. So, what i tried is going into a quiet room away from everyone and just laughing. (Or screaming) it gets your anger out and it makes me feel better. I probably havent helped but i wanted to write something to show you that there are more people who experience the same thing as you and i just poured my heart out in this comment. Please take note. I hope i have helped. Your shoulder to cry on, Demi.

See a Dr dear. Since you entered puberty it changed your hormones. Something is physically unbalanced. You are NOT weird. This time in peoples lives is very difficult and EXTREMELY emotional and people often feel insecure. The sooner you go for help the sooner you will be out living life again. I have been in that dark lonely place, but I escaped and you can too.

it's hard, but once out of high school, it gets better. you'll meet people. college is a great place to meet people who are closer to what you are like. even if you don't feel like, smile once in awhile. it actually does bring your mood up. please, try to find happiness because you're too young to let life pass you by.

If u want some help by me , u could add me <br />

Hi! I am not a doctor. You seem to share the same symptoms I had (still have) and I was finally diagnosed with dysthymia (look it up online). Medication won't cure you, but it can make life worth living. Hang in there!

i know what u mean, it sucks. I'm only 16 and i'm already wishing i could enjoy my childhood years again. I mean things didn't have to matter back then, just running around like a bunch of idiots during recess was enough to have fun, no worrying about having to make friends or fitting in. But i guess since we can't turn back time, we just have to deal with the cards we're dealt and i guess we both have ****** hands. But it seems like you have parents who actually acknowledge your lonliness, that's a start, and you seem like a pretty good person so all i can say is just hang in there and know that there are losers out there who feel your isolation, like me for instance. Well take care anyway, and hang in there.

Hello there! I agree with Geocruz. I think by you stepping up and talking about it you've made progress already. Good Job! I know you can't see this progress I talk of, only because you're the one going through it. But you are making positive progress here. My title in here besides my nickname is: "I'm here for you." I truly believe my purpose in life is to help others, in time others help themselves, and then help others. Good stuff. I have messengers and the time if you need someone. Just let me know. You are not alone sweetie. Take care & like I said, I'm here anytime. xxxx

Dear Heart, I know what you mean when I was your age I felt the same way...Please don't loose heart there are people who do genuinely care...perhaps a trusted adult, such as a school counselor. As hard as it is you can get through it. Your life is valuable and worth while please know that