Heartache

I don't know if this is normal.. I have a group of friends.. I really take and treat them as my friends.. But every now and then they will just go out and have fun without me.. Not even the thought of asking me along.. That's making me feel a bit unhappy.. I don't know if this is too much.. To expect others to be inviting me all the time? Should I be more initiative?BBut I'm feeling very tired.. It feels as though I'm clinging on to them only.. I don't get treated as a friend return.. Could it be my attitude? Usually I tend to do things alone or rather not involve people cos I thought they're not interested.. Will they feel as though I shut them off my world first? I'm clueless.. I'm in my university years now.. I do get depressed once a while.. Every time happiness overflows me, I will be a little afraid because my depression will strike anytime after that.
loste loste
18-21, M
1 Response Jan 13, 2013

This struck a cord my son had similar problems at uni I think he was overwhelmed and a bit scared even being there and fround it difficult to make friends. When he did like you they would often go out without him which upset him. He eventually learnt how to deal with things and he was fine. People can be unkind and if friends know you are a bit needy (not confident) they will use it against you a form of control. You feel tired because it depresses you because you don't feel in control of your life or what's happening. So yes you need to take the initiative more try arranging a visit to a club with a band on a particular night and ask your friends out, or a meal out, trip to the cinema etc don't be afraid to ask they can only say no and if they do then maybe you should look for different friends my son did. Force yourself to be a bit more outgoing and set yourself little goals even if it's only going up and making conversation with someone - think of what you will say before hand nothing wrong with planning things out in your head even if it's just a couple of lines it will help your confidence which will grow. You are young don't be so hard on yourself we've all been there good luck.