Loneliness

Today was my first day in college. Honestly it really sucked. I sat by myself the whole time and made no friends at all. Everyone else seemed to be very sociable. In high school I had many friends. And that was because I was a people pleaser. I was willing to degrade myself to make others laugh. On several occasions I even made jokes about myself. But in college, I want to be different. I wanted to have friends that actually liked me for who I was. I know its a small thing but it means so much to me. I tried to make myself look rich. I mean i carry all the latest gadgets and wear watches that are too expensive for someone my age. I only wear branded clothing and use expensive bags. And I really want to stop all this. Believe me, I really do. Its like I have a metaphorical chain chaining me to these things. I don't get depressed everyday. Most of the time I distract myself by watching sitcoms and movies. Honestly, I am terrified to go back to college. And it doesn't help the fact that I feel so freaking lonely all the time, depressed, constantly finding myself needing other people's approval. Well that's all I have to say now.
strangeperson94 strangeperson94
18-21, M
2 Responses Jan 14, 2013

I have to tell you that my first few days of college were some of the scariest, and loneliest days of my life. Maybe you could speak to someone on the college staff, and see if they have any social events planned for freshman, that you could attend? If not, then maybe there is a group on campus that you could become involved in? Once in college, I bought trash bags, and just started picking up trash on campus, while inviting random people to join me in an effort to keep our school clean, and to make friends. Just an idea.

Thank you for your advice. It really helped me :)

Make friends! even if its the nerdy type. u could really become close to someone if you tried :)

Thanks :)