Always Follow Yr Own Path.

O.k, I came on this mainly cos I'm bored but I have certainly experienced a lot of emotional ups and downs in my life. Anyway, here's a (true) story.
A few years ago I was recovering from a nervous breakdown and beginning a part-time college course. Y might know the feelings well ; over-compensating in groups, self-medicating through heavy-drinking and generally not feeling too confident or happy.
I met what I thought was a like-minded friend - who was happy to buy me a round- and we began drinking/bonding at this strange little student bar in the college campus of the course (beginners film studies) we were both getting started on.
We hung out quite regularly after that and became what I would call pretty good friends, For some time I assumed this would stay the case. A pattern developed of us once/twice/sometimes three times a week getting ridiculously drunk on a box of wine or whatever was cheapest, as both our lives had sort-of gone a bit awry in the direction-stakes. I have since sorted out my drinking and made a lot of positive moves forward but at the time, I couldn't imagine the point of life if you couldn't drink the horribleness away.
So after a year or so of us being friends, having a life, bemoaning our lack of jobs, delineating future plans etc etc my friend finally got a full-time job. I was chuffed for him but a bit worried as I hadn't yet achieved getting back into work. 2 weeks later my friend (why not call him Tom, for sake of story) got in a new flat, which housed about 10 people, (alot of them Spanish travellers) and found a new girl.
Now Tom had made it clear to me, my friendship was valued and i was basically a sound bloke but the minute he got in his new flat (with all the shiny-new buddies) I started getting treated like a social leper. This was mainly down to 3 factors : 1. I had depression 2. I was open to his new pals about this and the drink counselling I was attending and 3. because i wouldn't go along with his sick, very detailed joking about f-----g my mum.
Anyway the schism(s) in our friendship came to ahead and the dude whaled on me verbally in front of all his flat-mate buddies and more or less, stabbed me in the back.
I decided enough was enough and walked away from this friendship feeling rather small and alienated.....but...
Not long after this I felt a big surge in postivity(also partly due to being drink-free for a while) and since the whole debacle realized I was looking for acceptance with the wrong people.I am no longer depressed, much more confident and have seen my life in general get a whole lot more positive.
So I guess my message is , always follow your own path and don't let feelings of despair and loneliness convince you your'e a loser. Also beware of domineering people !
Caravel78 Caravel78
1 Response Mar 31, 2013

well its great U ve chosen to move on in a right sure U ll meet new people....
bar scene is never the best place to start quality friendships..........