I'Ll Tell You About Yesterday.

So yesterday being the wretch I am was one of "those" days. I woke up with gloom in my heart. Being England the weather was perfectly gloomy, nice and gray.

I felt different, like I was hanging on a thread. I got to college, a few minutes late I stopped going in early when the woman left my life. Anyway.

So there I was sitted listening to my tutor mindlessly drone about the boring **** we'd be doing today and for some reason I was feeling fed-up and extremely angry I was thinking the whole time. "I came in for this ****?" You see getting up out of bed for me should really award achievement points.

It's the first fight I face when I awake from slumper. Back to the story. So my tutor left the room told while she went to get something and I just...snapped. I just got up, left the room, left college walked to the train station bought a ticket to London and just went.

I had to be alone, I felt like the walls had closed in on me. And you know what, it felt good. It felt bloody great to just leave like that. I had a lonely day as usual but it was less lonely because I didn't have to be lonely around people.

I went to my favourite place, the Nation Gallery and spent an hour just looking at the paintings. I tried to find Caravaggio again but too many school kids so I left, went to the British Library read for a bit then decided to go to a museum.

I went to the Natural History Museum. Pretty awesome stuff there. And then I just watched traffic from a Balcony near Kings Cross and got a MacDonalds and took the train home.

I got home about 7pm my stepdad told me the college weren't happy. I couldn't care less to be honest. I had a less depressing day, I stayed away from anywhere with a bridge though just in case I though **** it. Sometimes I really would do it.

My stepdad understanding as always told me I have to and I quote "Snap out of this depression thing, just sort yourself out."

I nearly walked out the door. He doesn't understand how it feels. Everyday, the war that goes on in my head the war that's just a stalemate.

Anyway that was my day. Then I watched House of Cards on Netflix. ******* brilliant, recommend it.
NofaceMichael NofaceMichael
18-21, M
1 Response Feb 2, 2013

Ignore him people don't understand depression if they do not have it themselves. If you feel the need to escape that's fine but try to hold on till the end of the day. I would recommend talking to the college as they may have a suport system for you or at the very least give you someone to talk to. But everyone wants to escape one in a whie and it is good to do so. But please do keep trying

thanks, I don't want to appear as a rebel or be that kid. I'm trying to be better, and ignore my thoughts. It's hard but I'm trying.

I understand, if you need to talk just drop me an email. Even if you jut need to rant. :)