Lately I've felt as if no one is by my side anymore. I feel as if everyone is against me. Even my best friend has stopped hanging out with me and I asked him why and he never responded.

My name is Adam, and I am 14 years old.

I have always had friends and people always tell me how funny I am but I don't believe them. Everyday I struggle with this and it's killing me. I have so many problems that eat me up inside. I feel like everything I do is wrong. Whenever I do something wrong I'm called "lazy, inconsiderate, or useless." My parents and brothers don't realize that these words hurt to me and it makes me just want to stay in my room and just cry. It makes me feel like a worthless pile of junk that is just here because I was born an oops anyway. My teachers also tell me how smart I am, but school has to be my main link of stress and depression. Everyday I go to school and I become overwhelmed by the noise, the amount of work, and the nonstop uncomfortableness. And even worse I have to walk home and I have flat feet so it hurts. Because I'm overweight. Everyday I wake up. Look in the mirror, and I sigh. All I see is an ugly blob of worthless fatness.

My family I do love. But they make fun of me because I'm sensitive. Who wants to be sensitive? It's awful and you cry ALOT. I know I don't like it, but I was born like that so they shouldn't make fun of me for it. And I feel as if my brothers don't like me and I'm just an annoyance that doesn't need to be included in anything. I ask of they want to go out or play a game or something "No." They'll be playing a game or something else and I ask if I can join them. "No. Go away." It's only occasional that I get to play a game with them and it's usually because my mom forces them to. I hate that I'm always bored and all my life I have been stuck doing things alone. And my parents wonder why I sit on the computer all day and I don't go out. I obviously don't tell them about my problems. I hate being this way. I hate being fat I hate being bored and alone and sad and depressed. I hate my life and I feel as if I should just end it.

I just.... Wish I had someone to talk to.
AdamBomb645 AdamBomb645
26-30, M
2 Responses Aug 18, 2014

Its normal to base your self worth on the opinions of other people and society, but it is also stupid. People, even your family will try to bring you down. Be your own captain. Know that you are worthy. That you are valuable. That you can do and change whatever it is that you want. But dont change something about you only because other people look down upon it. Your sensitivity can be a strength. Own it.

Thanks Driano. I think I'll try being the captain of my own ship and sensitivity could be a strength. It is also empathy and comes with a lot of passion. I just think I need someone to make me feel confident. Thanks for the advice! 😄

Hi im here if u need a friend to vent or talk to. Any advice I have ill give. Feel free to read my stories and comment ur thoughts n feelings. I can relate to how u r feeling. Take care **hugs

I felt that amazing hug from here. 😄 I really appreciate you considering yourself for me to talk to. I will think about it. I don't feel comfortable here yet but I do kind of like the idea. Thanks again.