I have accepted the fact that i'm depressed. I would love to talk to someone but live in a country where that doesn't really exist.
I think the depression of living here and being in the situation i'm in is causing me breathing problems. Well I didn't think of that on my own, someone asked me if I ever thought the reason i sometimes have breathing problems is because im depressed.Well it is a big possibility.
I recently moved here and have no one to talk to. All my friends live thousands of miles away. I want to tell someone I don't want this life anymore. I want to leave and start over somewhere new without him.
My husband changed. I married him after being best friends with him for 3 years. Now its like I don't know him anymore. I don't understand where I lost him. He's become controlling, cold, close-minded and everything any typical man from this region is. I married him because he was not. Freedom and being independent is very important to me, and hard for me to give up for anyone.
Yesterday he told me "start acting like a wife". I never knew that the term meant anything different from the person he's been in love with for 4 years. I don't understand why he expects me to change. I don't fit into this culture....and he knew that better than anyone.
So he's making me choose.....either me or him.
He already assumes I chose him....I'm just taking my time to re-think and re-evaluate my decisions.