Insecurity Is The New "man"

It's embarrassing to be a REAL man these days....mostly because nobody knows what a REAL man is, they just listen to a media perception bought and sold like bullet riddled automobiles on a state auction block.

There are two types of men in modern society - the Nice Guy (TM), and the Jerk

The Nice Guy is the pacifist. The guy who can't get a woman or at least laid because he's disguising his love interest under the veil of his niceness in hopes she'll be with/**** him because he's a "Nice Guy". Being a "Nice Guy" does not get you crap except the perception that you cannot handle the truth and have no balls. These are the guys bosses call upon to do all the crappy jobs, because they don't complain, or at least scare the **** out of the boss by being themselves. These are the guys who whine and complain all day long that life is hard on them, yet make no effort to get out of their dire situation. Eventually, these guys get fed up with being sexless, respect-less, and they turn into.....

The Jerk, the whole opposite extreme. We're talking about sexual harassers and homophobes. We're talking about racists, and the insulting ******** who bullyrag, vex, and heckle the rest of us. Yeah, they get the girls, yeah, they get the high paying jobs, because unlike the Nice Guy, they have the guts to go for what they want....but do they have the guts for the sweeter side of life....hell no, because that side of life is "*****" or "gay" to them. It's got to be extreme. It could be something like being the obnoxious brat at the party, or the guy who busts into your house late at night and steals your things at gunpoint. Either way, the whole idea is that you have to PROVE your maleness, much like how the Nice Guy has to prove how NICE he is.

I've been both, both are a losing situation, and to be honest, I think both are *******, they are both scared of being human.

As a nice guy, It all starts off well. Everybody likes you because you are "so nice" and "so easy to get along with", then it starts, they realize "hey, this guy is nice, he must have no balls"....then they try to get you hooked on your own niceness to gain advantage of you. Like an egotistical form of crack cocaine, you sink deeper and deeper into the trap others have made of your own psyche, craving more and more in hopes of becoming loved, accepted, or at least, liked enough to hang with the cool guys and screw the less as attractive-to-you gal once in awhile just to feel like everyone else, to feel like you belong. Eventually, you get tired of being ignored, unnoticed, and used for whatever good you might possess, and you decide to take it to the other extreme......the Jerk.

As a Jerk, you often start off all alone, and build your influence on others by being that untouchable, perfect tough guy. You don't let anyone dissuade you from doing the things you want, even if it's a bad idea, and you refuse to THINK it over. You idolize other people who are most likely not even real in order to impress others with your fake persona, only the most intuitive around you realize this, the rest, like sheep, are led to believe you are secure in yourself because you are being successful. But your success is hindered by your ever-growing insecurity that if you cease to be "cool", make retarded decisions because they are "fun" or "cool", you too will cease to be cool. Eventually, people begin to figure you out, and realize you are no different than when you were a nice guy, except now you totally lack the benifits that being a nice guy has, thus leading you to be excluded in the end. Excluded could be anything from losing friends to losing your job, to going to jail for something stupid you did to feel the ego you built in order to feel accepted/important/loved/desirable, or whatever other lofty social goal you require.

The Media has ruined Man for decades. We're portrayed as braindead idiots that only love three things, sex, football, and beer, and sadly, the majority buy into this stereotype that that's what being a man is all about. Throw in a good dose of hurting others for no reason except that they differ from you, and an inability to just "look away" from the things we disapprove of, but to NOT look away when the pressure is on and it truly is important NOT to look away. Being a man is more than being an alcoholic sexaholic nymphomaniac who worships Super Bowl Sunday. Sadly, we, as the masculine side of our species, have accepted this, embraced it, and bought it lunch all year round', for years.

So where do I stand now. A TRUE man knows what he likes, but he knows his limits. He ***** up, but he lives up to his mistakes. A true man cares not about another man's sexuality unless he swings in that direction, he's more concerned with his own. A true man's woman is not a trophy or a sentient blow-up doll, but something far deeper than that, and dear god, don't get me started on the nightmare that is woman these days, that's another experience. A true man gets the job done, but will not let others push him around. A true man knows when to hit and when to stay. How do I know this, because it seems I do all of these things, or am in this frame of mindset, when I'm at my best in life. That mindset where I can cut out all the fat and bullshit from life easily, and get to the cold hard facts and get stuff done, which leads to my true personality coming through. If more guys would do this, and be themselves, maybe we would not keep our tarnished image as insecure morons.

Am I saying I'm perfect, hell no, I have my Nice Guy and Jerk moments, I have my good days and bad like anyone else, but any guy who feels the need to be some sort of absolutist bastard about my own personal views because it's his idea of what the "male" way is, well, he can go ride his own face to kingdom come for all I care.

Then there's the social conventions tied to personal taste and such....screw them, a real man cares not what others think of him (within reason), but rather, lives how he sees fit, and means no malice to those who disagree, or any undue praise to those who do.

Sadly, I'm a rare dying breed, and often misrepresented as one or the other. It hurts because I'm put across as this heartless ******* to some, and a pushover to others, when in reality, those were just the best choices at that moment in time for me. I'm embarassed to be associated with the overgrown monkeys and wannabe-civilized brats. I just want to be me, and be left to be me in peace, without all this over introspective bullshit. That is the truly manly thing to do, to show your strength, integrity, and be your own man, something that is long lost in today's society....

And I think I'll stop now, as I'm getting tired and falling asleep at the keyboard writing this now. Just some thoughts tonight after spending time ignoring thinly veiled insults from a man-child whom I play music with sometimes. Time to sleep for awhile.
DarkParade83 DarkParade83
1 Response Mar 12, 2010

You are so correct that a real man has the courage to be true to himself no matter what. All men...YES, REAL men are NOT alike. There is no one-size-fits-all. Such worn-on-your-sleeve nonsense comes from male ignorance that lends power to the erroneous belief that manhood is group-owned and can be denied to those who aren't carbon copies of other males who stagnate in their own wheel-spinning stupidity. And he doesn't have to revolve his entire worth as a "man" around getting women and having kids, then potentially end up miserable. A real man these days can do whatever he pleases (that's legal, of course). He makes a plan (his OWN plan...not live out other's plans) and strives to make those plans come to fruition. He isn't obsessed with what other think about him for if he does he will end up an obedient puppet who isn't allowed to sit at his own control panel! Yes, the male gender is embarrassing for many men these days because most of these puppets wouldn't know real manhood if it sat in their laps, called them momma, then fell on them. Like idiots, they are too hung up on thinking that manhood is ONLY about women, kids, blind-obedience, and making sure people don't think they are gay---which being gay has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with denial of manhood---unless one is given to thinking the noble concept of manhood is reduced to brainless thoughts about penises and other body parts and their relative activities and frequency of engagement. None of that stupid, debasing nonsense for some men! Thank God!