Lost Somewhere Between Then And NowSitting alone, unable to sleep, my mind whirling, continuously replaying the other night, comparing it to now...this moment. The stark difference shocks my system, momentarily stills my heart, and quiets my breath. My mind reels sleeplessly in confusion and disbelief.
Who was that man who needed me so....who held me tight and professed his unending love and desire...who opened his heart and coaxed me in, again? Who was that man who seemed to read my mind giving me what I want before I even had a chance to ask...saying all those things I needed to hear. Who was he? And who is this man who today looks upon me with a coldness in his eyes and ice in his heart....who is distant and unwelcoming....who seems to want to hurt me for sport....whose cruel words open old wounds that never seem to heal? Who is he....who are YOU? I feel like I know you better than anyone, yet there are times I don't feel I know you at all.
The suddenness with which our relationship changes makes my head spin. I can't keep up. I'm dumbfounded...confused...I can't understand. I being to wonder if it's all me. There has to be something I've done or haven't done. I tiptoe around you asking myself what I can do to get the man that I love back...the man who loves me back. I get anxious, paying careful attention to my words, my tone, my ex