What Have The Mayans Ever Done For Us?

Well, the most recent apocalypse hasn’t happened yet. That, at least, takes it out of the hands of the 666 numerology Christians who thought 12/12/12 was a risky day.  I’d have really hated it if they’d been proven right.  Imagine the smug look on their misshapen fundamentalist faces…
The up-front Churchy types missed their year 2000 day of judgment, and the Jehovah's Witnesses have a new date every year so no-one believes them any longer, so now we’ve just got to see off the Mayans and we’ll be fine.
The wisdom of the Mayans is not to be sniffed at: Blood sacrifice is intriguing, I like bright coloured feathers, and sacramental drug use is essentially a good thing.  Amen to all that.  But let’s not make them out to be culturally significant on a global scale.  The terrain was hard in Mayan times so perhaps their backwardness can be put down to cultural isolation.  Did they invent much?
Llamas, coffee, cocaine.
Square pyramids.
Good scrabble words.
Nice gold trinkets.
Some helpful ‘How to farm on a slope’ tips (but the Tibetans had done that and got the sweat-shop-made T-shirt centuries before).
I know there’ll be do-gooders moaning about my cultural imperialism, but I’m not that wrong.

Personally I’d rather have a llama than a Dali Lama, coke over pepsi, and Jaguar gods are more enigmatic than sacred cows, but this Mayan calendar lark, what a fuss about nothing.
The long version of the Mayan calendar ‘runs out’ on the 21st , but the randomness of counting 394 years from the last ‘turn’ of the calendar is entirely meaningless.  It’s no different from saying that our calendar ends on the 31st and there’ll be no 1st of January, time will end, the void will suck us all in.
On the bright side at least I won’t have to pay my bills from Christmas.
CrookedMan CrookedMan
1 Response Dec 15, 2012

I didn't know some people treated December 12 as a risky day... Man, I kinda missed out on the countdown for that.

My stand though is that December 21 won't be the end of the world. It'll literally be the end of the Mayan calendar and the start of a new era. I'd qualify that to be a start of a new spiritual era but you don't need to know that. ;)