There are times, and tiny moments, where I think I'm happy.
Where I have this image, and illution, that I'm able to move on.
But then, I get knocked down again.
Reality kicks in and says 'You're heart is still broken, you need closure to move on'.
And I get back in this cycle of being heartbroken, endlessly.
I cry at night, and feel so alone and it hurts so much..
CactusHugger CactusHugger
2 Responses Feb 3, 2013

I was the one that did the dumpinb in my relationship but it was for the safety of my kids. unfortunately I am still in love with him. We broke up about 6 weeks ago and he us already dating somebody. That hurt is very sharp and it won't go away for a long time. I am thinking of getting on some meds to help with the depression. I know it won't stop it but maybe it will curb it. I hoe you get the closure you need and remember that it will get better with time.

Thank you for reading my story.
I actually got closure today, I will write about it now in a new story.
I also wish you recover from this, because there is nothing more painful that seeing the one you love with someone else.

What could possibly make you feel this way CactusHugger?

My first love broke up with me, and I am sekeing closure which I'm not getting.
There are so many things going on in my life right now, which all bother me.

You have people to talk to right? Family, friends, therapist etc...

I have family, but it also hurts them to see me in pain, it makes me feel guilty.
My friends aren't really there for me.
I tried looking for a therapist, but they are expensieve..

I just read your previous story 'Desperately Seeking Closure' and I've got to say if he already had a partner 11 days after you broke up he clearly didn't value the relationship as much as you did. You really cared for the guy and he was prepared to dump you and move on just like that!
This tells me two things, either he is used to dating girls & ditching them or he didn't give a **** about you and in both instances that loser is not worth you getting upset about, i'm sure a pretty girl like you could easily get another guy anyway

Hehe, thank you.
It's more confusing because he claims to still have feelings for me.
Then why did he break up with me? It's so strange.
We've had issues, but his behaviour only made things worse.

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