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Love

I was so much in love. I am so much in love. I can't seem to get out of it. I think it's because I loved such a quirky, unique person...and everyone else just seems dull by comparison. I sacrificed a lot to be with this person in the first place, and now I just can't get him out of my head.

This person got badly hurt by their ex-girlfriend in the past. She lives in another state. But we dated for about a year and a half and he seemed to be completely over it. We had wonderful happy times...life was really beautiful for me like it's never been before. But the ex-girlfriend and her family got stranded here on the way to see family for Christmas. So she stayed at my boyfriend's house. And guess what they did that night? All night?

He lied to me for weeks. Even though he didn't love me, he used me a little longer. He played mind games with me and kept going back and forth, hurting me again and again. He broke up with me over the phone. And now he says he never loved me...it's like the year or so of wonderful never happened. Even though we were both happy.

He'll probably start trying to woo his ex again. She contacted me, to apologize, but mostly just to rub it in. I won, you lost. Ha ha.

I just feel completely lost. I know I shouldn't love this person, I shouldn't want this person, but I've loved him for so long, and he's already forgotten about me. Maybe nothing we shared was real, nothing at all. And now I'll never be a part of his life.

I don't know what to do now....he said he still feels close to me and wants to be friends. But this is getting harder and harder for me to do. After what happened I feel so hurt and worthless all the time. But I miss him terribly when we're apart...I wish I could stay away, I wish I could stop feeling this way. What should I do?

Maradal Maradal 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 23, 2010

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well iam goin through the same thing..my ex gf almost did the same thing...i thought she was jus influenced or dint know what she was doing..but few ppl in dis world are heartless or rather selfish..i was with her for 19 months and it din even take her 3 days after to find a new guy...i couldnt sleep or eat for days..but i guess time is the biggest healer....i realised one thing that day...my happiness is what matters the most...sacrifices in love work well only in movies..u gotta be practical....<br />
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always say this to yourself...<br />
he/she was not worth the effort..i deserve better..

The best thing to do for now is stay mad, every time you think about him try and think about the bad times and force yourself to not talk to him. I know it sounds harsh but you need to go through the emotion and deal with it so you can move on. Ive done it quite a few times and it still took me awhile to get over the person but it worked. <br />
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I hope you get through this and find someone who loves you and will take care of you no matter what.

I told him today, "We can't be friends, and I love you." Then I walked away. He said "Maybe someday," but I'm thinking never...even though we've been so so close for about a year.<br />
This friendship would never work. He gets angry and frustrated if I cry or act unusually quiet around him, even though he knows I'm heartbroken. Ugh. How insensitive can you get?<br />
I'm still in shock over everything...it really came out of nowhere.<br />
I'm determined not to talk to him, and hopefully things will get better!

I am going through something very similar at the moment, I just wrote a story about it. I put up with my Ex's crap for five years. Finally he pushed me to the edge, and I am saying goodbye. You just need to go one day at a time, and each day find the strength not to talk to him. Whatever you do, don't talk to him or your progress will all be for nothing. One day things will get better, however long that will take. You just need to survive up until that moment. I know it's hard, but there are many of us in the world who have been through this situation and we have all lived through it. All of us hurt women are here for you, and we understand Hun. Just remember that you are not alone!