Life As A Woman
Posted November 16th, 2010 at 10:49PM
As a teenager we begin to find who we truly are. WE question our friendships, we question who we are. We dive into our interests. We start to date, we have our first kiss, we begin to notice the changes in our bodies, we get insecure, we cry, we get emotional, Not all of us have our first kiss, but we think about it.
As a young adult, we are thrown into the world, trying to figure out our first big decision of what we want to do with our lives, we find love, some get married, some get divorced, some gain hearts and some get broken hearts. We continue to dream, we enter the workforce for the very first time. WE know our bodies, and we learn to enjoy sex. We are each on a journey, and we are the ones behind the paths we take.
In our thirties, we are comfortable with who we are. We don't put up with people's **** nearly as much. We say what's on our minds, we no longer hold back. We are confident with our bodies, and we begin to notice the changes in them too. We put on weight, we have children, we're thrown into motherhood. For some of us, we never become mothers, for some of us, we lose a parent for the first time or may be even younger. Some of us find out that we can not conceive children, some of us find out we really don't want children. Some of us may find that what we wanted out of life was not what we wanted at all, and some of us are brave enough to start over. Some of us had a dream of being married, and then realized the dream was no longer his, or no longer yours together. Others hit a patch in their relationship, had some lows. Some may have been diagnosed with a disease for a very first time, others may have had a loved one grow ill and lose life. Some of us get that promotion we've been working towards while others of us realize the job we in is not the job for us, yet again.
In our 40's, we are living life. For some of us, we have a family, have a career, and have a house that we have finally made a home. For others, life did not necessarily end up this way. For some, we find the road we wanted to travel did not work out that way. For some, we have a little bit more edge to us. For others, we realize what life is. Some are luckier than others, some want that family life, or some lucked out with that great relationship. Some were lucky enough to have friendships that lasted throughout the years. For others, we are faced with life and the reality of what has become of it. But it does not stop us. We continue to keep the fight going. And we continue to work hard.
In our 50s we realize we're getting old. We look at our accomplishments and realize what an amazing woman we've become... We take trips, we explore the world, we enjoy life. We relax more, we are blessed For others, we are now the caregivers of our parents, taking care of them, as their health deteriortes before our eyes. It is hard to see the same person that gave us their everything like this, so wear, and so fragile. It is sad, it is hard work, but we do it because the love we have is unconditional. We continue to work hard in our jobs, and a new worry sets in that our job may not be nearly as secure as it once was. We're getting older, and we realized we can be replaced so easily with someone younger, someone that knows the latest technology where we aren't nearly as steadily learners right now. Some of us have our grandchildren to look at for the very first time, and we start to spoil our grandkids and help our children become parents, or for even some, become the parenting figure because our children weren't quite ready for this new role in their lives. Some of us find out we have cancer, or our loved one was.
There is so much we endure in life. The older we become, the wiser we do become of the life experience we have. But with every new experience comes tears of happiness or tears of sadness. Every new experience comes with struggles and successes. We may meet failure, but we pick ourselves back up and do it all over again. We learn, we grow, we endure. Being a woman is not easy. Each journey and path is so different for everyone. But I just truly hope you never lose your dreams.
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I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for showing us that each stage of life has it's own beauty.
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i like this story!!! very well written!!
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Great report on Your journey!
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This is great I'm in my 30's but still can't say what's on my mind....but this is great writing, keep it up :)
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This is a wonderful story of a woman's life journey. I am in my 50's and have found that as I get older I have more confidence in the woman I've become. I don't feel as old as I am and have enjoyed getting older.
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Wonderful story. Especially the part where you become so independant. I am sure your husband appreciates the fact that you have no more use for him. He only spent his entire life providing for you and your children, if you have them. Now that you have your "confidence", you can kick him to the curb like an old worn out tool.
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That has happened to many of us trevor. But life goes on and those who take the trouble to search for it find new hope where none seemed to exist before among other old worn out tools.
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don't act like some sort of a victim. when women gain confidence they don't just kick men to the ground - some do, but a lot don't - they just gain confidence and have respect for themselves, it's when they truly know themselves and accept themselves for what they are. confidence is not about kicking your husband down, you obviously have some issues if you think it is. and btw, nowadays not only men provide for families, in case you havent notice. im a teen, but i dont know one woman out of all my mums friends, my friends mothers, my friends mothers friends who does not work and also provide for their family. 'nuff said.2 more replies -
You make a great point. I love how you broke it down, but the decades.
Bare Hugs
Nudy -
The ending line is truly nice...well written...thanks...
the less we depend on others for happiness esp husband , the more happy we are...........:) -
That is a wonderful story in being in touch and happiness within you own skin...Angie..;-)
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Your assessment is great in the past for most people except for people of color.
Today, your story doesnt add up for most of the middle class. Jobs are overseas because of NAFTA. No more manuafacturing, inventing, assemblies, research all are overseas. So there are no unions to protect american workers, people have lost their retirement money thru IRA's, so-called safe investments were stolen by wallstreet etc. So much worry where the money is coming from. Can't find a job. Women still make 30 cents less than a man etc.
So your story only works for a highly paid woman but mostly for women who are married and they go into retirment together. There are one third more women in the US than men. So since your not late 30's thru 60's or more you don't know what its like for a woman to be alone and scared have to be extra careful to open the door when the bell rings because their is no man to feel protected by. Its a nice dream thought....! -
Being a person of color I found this story delightful and applicable to my life and many women of color that I know in all stages of life..... The rest of this comment was way out there so I wont comment on it.
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i think your reading to much into this story. it is supposed to be about the life of a woman and how many people have ups and downs but we all get through it. no matter your situation. this story is still a good assessment on women today and what they go through. its not describing details its more about the life in general. -
Hi. I'm looking for someone who can chat on Yahoo IM. I have to use that cuz I'm at work and that way I can use my phone. I just wanna chat to make my day go by cuz its boring here.
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Thats so very true..well said.
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Great story. Great journey. I feel inspired. Thanks 4 sharing. :)
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And we then get REALLY older (and wiser) we hope = after marriage number one, at the age of 24, we find we married a virgin, who became an adultress - get divorced, live alone for 8 years;
Then meet a motherly type, enjoy, lots of love, and the years roll by, the wife number two, (After 32 years of wedded bliss---starts to endure stroke, after storke, and they eventually depart this life - and at the age of 76, we find we are so lonely, so we do something about it. -
We get onto the internet, and Advertise - for a new Wife - number three comes along, we marry in Thailand - holiday in the UK, then come back to live here, and then, right now - we buy tickets to return to the land of my birth, and hopefully,(if I do not fall off my perch) we shall be in the UK in February. Life is good, and I feel so young!!! Dontheturner. Age 80+ -
This is well put. Kind of scary that we are so predictable and it felt like I could relate to most of the decades an echo of everyones lives! However it's a positive outlook so that's great for you. Well done
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Wow Trevorhart! First of all the husband didn't spend his ENTIRE life providing for me and MY children, I worked just as hard or harder than he did since I worked outside of the home and then came home and worked until I collapsed into bed from exhaustion only to get up a few hours later and start all over again, AND they were his children also not just mine. This is a wonderful story and puts a woman's life into prospective.
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As far as i am concerned that is the biggest load of old BOLLOCKS I have ever heard. Sadly, my life has been nothing like that.
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This might be why I like older women.
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Well, I guess I am in the minority. I DON'T think this is particularly a good story at all.
First of all as a teenager, I noticed changes in my body well before I had my first kiss. Next I knew where I was going with my life before my first kiss/date. I felt secure in what direction I wanted my life to take and immediately upon graduation from high school I embarked on that destination. It was a long journey because I had to enter the workforce before completion of my destination. I reached beyond my original destination through a strong perseverance.
As a very young adult, I found my love, married, had one child and supported my husband in his career with the same strong commitment.
In my thirties, I did not spout off at the mouth but dignified myself with different means of confidence. Yes, I put on weight after my second and last child. I never felt that I was THROWN into motherhood. What does that really mean? My husband and I took many trips and enjoyed life with our children.
I had my career when I was in my twenties.....had a house that was made a home from the very beginning. Does it take until your forties to make a home? What am I missing? I didn't lack the knowledge of where I was going at this age. Hey guys if you don't know where you are going at this age....SAD! My husband and I continued to travel and enjoy ourselves.
In my 50's had no idea we were getting old. All along our journey we looked at our accomplishments, our children and realized that we have made and are still making a difference in this world. We continued to travel and enjoy our lives. We bought a retirement home with money we earned not from any inheritance. We did relax and do feel very blessed.
In our 60's we were blessed with grandchildren and are happy about our personal accomplishments. We continue to travel and explore the world and enjoy the fruits of our careers.
In my 70's one Saturday morning, suddenly my personal life took a nosedive when my beloved had a massive heart attack. How quickly your life can be turned upside down!!!
Live each day to the fullest....you never know if it will be your last. -
What a beautiful and graceful thought from a "youngin". Not only is it a tribute to the maturation of a woman, but it can also serve as a template for a man. Well done.
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Well, not to rain on anyone's parade, but I think you may have a rude awakening about the cold realities of a typical woman's 50's. In my circle of lifelong girlfriends, not one of us is enjoying a carefree life with more relaxation, traveling and seeing the world. We have more on our plates than ever before!! Most of us are divorced (not by choice) after 20 yrs or more of marriage. Gone are the dreams of a secure retirement with a lifelong partner. We are now in survival mode, working fulltime hoping we have the stamina to work for 10 more years. We can't count on our 401K's anymore (mine alone lost 70% of former value) but are realistic enough to be so grateful for our jobs. Our parents are getting old, sick and dying. Most of us women become primary caregivers whether it be physically and/or emotionally and the long term burnout felt by so many of us is overwhelming. Yet, we are good daughters and we do what we need to do.
Alot of you may think I'm just bitter, and yes, to some degree I am. When in my 30's, I too had a very hopeful and innocent vision of my future. But then the cruel realities of life descended on me as well as many women I know.
But, you know, I still have alittle hope for the future. I'm hoping the 60's are better. I look forward to being a grandma. I look forward to going on trips and traveling the world.....more carefree times....
g -
Your story gives me confidence that their are better days ahead. Thank You
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The most important things i have learned in life are family.
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I enjoyed reading this, I hope it's true x
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What a wonderful story. I'm finding that I am only now truly coming into who I really am as a fearless woman warrior and I am 45! It is never too late to find your true self- follow your heart and soul and don't let anyone else dictate what you can or cannot do. Namaste!
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That first 3 paragraphs are hella true.
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Nope, can't agree with you and the shiny happy warrior ones here...life can be a cher of bowlies and getting old...well say what you like about just how wonderful it is and the reality is it s***ks. I'd prefer life in reverse...start out old and end up as just a gleam in your parents eyes
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Thank God am here to read this type of story
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wow what a load of xxxxx, its easy to say this but most women get more miserable as they get older, 40 to 50 divorced good luck on finding a decent guy, they are all divorced and wont do it again ever, and on top of that, these old women become cougars and give the younger ones competition, and the women in there 30's and 40's love that.
so say what you want any of you, but when you drive your husband away by a never ending nagging, and it will come, one day he wakes up and says i am done, and just leaves, and she is wondering why, lol better to be 40 and single/divorced as a guy and have 25 to 30 year GF then ever get some old used up depreciated bag of bones -
i always enjoy when i hear of a woman who found her indipendence, but get a bit upset if she states she did so without man, as well as man the 180. i man am nothing without woman nor is woman without man. even the women of women an men of men most call gay would have no life without both sexes loving each other. so therefore the bible is correct an to disagree will make a fool out of the one sex saying anything without honoring both sexes. think not, how many gays an fools live today for god plays no favorit to any sex or person, or people. bottom line, do not fall for that lie by people an certain persons, indipendence is a man an woman lovers, all else is their glory to show both the good an bad of societies beliefs so both stay lovers.
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