I Am Finding It Hard To Live

I am 26, I have been utterly lonely for 26 years. I see double/triple standards everywhere. I see my family as resenting my existance, and genuinly feel it would have been better if I was not born. I have gone to univeristy, did realitively well, secured a job, had a few boyfriends, I am not over weight or extreemly ugly, but I experience this utter loneliness, and now, the negitivity of all of life seems to have lached onto me. I am invisable in my family, unwanted, a burden, I have no circle of friends and I sit in most weekends. I have tried thearpy, new hobbies, new courses but it is always the same result. I feel I cannot stand up for myself, and live in a state of fear. Fear of living and fear of dieing, fear of what other people think, fear of being left alone for ever more. I have friends in different places but I am the one who makes the effort, who calls or visits. I am sick of contact with technology and need some human contact. Geesus just someone to meet for a coffee once a week. I hate it. I really do hate this meagre existance I have. the double standards in my family hurt the most esp with my parents. it is so hard to explain. I just dont know what I am going to do...I cant contunue like this. I will not be able to cope if it does.
empty26 empty26
26-30
2 Responses Jul 16, 2010

Jayjoy is right. Seek professional help. Also consider the groups called MEET UP on the internet to see if there is one in your area. If you hike, bike, or might even take something up to be with some of the people in the different groups. I know they would not be judging you. Then also try to find out if there are any other groups in you are you might join. I hope you will just take that first step, and I can promise you, even if it takes two or three more steps, you will be thrilled you did it. Good luck and feel free to up-date or ask us any more questions. You can do it!

Dear empty 26,<br />
First understand that life isn,t always fair, that includes your own family. Realize you did not asked to be born. You owe your family absolutely nothing, they raised you to adulthood like any other family..You are an adult, you need not answer to nobody. What you need now is the courage to take charge of your life, and if that means packing your bags moving somewhere where you can be yours elf and meet new friends and have new experiences and allow yourself some self respect, And I <br />
know from a similar personel experience that it was the smartest move I ever made in my life.<br />
You need not to live in fear, what other people think is not important, Its only what you think of <br />
yourself that counts.Good familys love and support their children. Take charge of your life!!!