Feeling Like Things Are Going Nowhere.

I just wanna get established and provide everything for myself.  if i was this age (21 years old) 20 years ago, i could've graduated high school, got a full time job, and moved the hell out of my mothers house but because of this stupid economy, good luck finding a job with only a high school education that will give your more than 20 hours a week. go to college you say? why would i wanna spend tens of thousands of dollars to get a higher education only to get a job that would pay $12-15 an hour and still only give me 20 hours or less a week. (the job market is pretty bleak in the part of the US i live in) on a different note, my mom (who i live with) has no problem living in complete filth. her house is completely cluttered and smells like **** all the time. dishes mounded up in the sink. bad food in the fridge. the room with the catbox smells like a public restroom in a subway station cause the cats **** everywhere. there is not ******* room for anything or anyone. apart from the two chairs in the living room people sit in to watch tv, theres a bunch of piled up ****. the worst part of this whole situation is that she doesn't see a problem. i refuse to put any effort into keeping the house clean because she doesn't put in any effort and its her house. any time i bring this up, she first says, "id do more if you did more" and then she finishes the sentence with, "you can leave if you dont like how i keep my house" so its her house that i need to maintain. see, I dont even know why im complaining, because I'm (slowly) on my way to being independent and making decent progress, but living in this kinda environment is soul crushing and while i know what i need to do to get out of here, its taking so ******* long.
imarobot imarobot
18-21, M
May 22, 2012