How do you work closely with someone that you don't even like anymore? Without going into too much detail, I will try to tell this story.
Used to be, we worked great together - honestly and fairly. In the past 10 years, she has hired both of her sons and several friends. We have a total of 49 guys who work for us. Winter months are incredibly slow and work is scarce. Both her kids and all 3 guys, her friends, worked daily--if and when they wanted to. While the other 44 men sat home worrying about losing their homes and putting food on the table. I listened to each and every one of them and kept telling them the same thing each time: I know it's bad, I'm doing everything I can, hang in there - summer is coming and work will pick up and it'll be ok. Sometimes that speach worked, sometimes it didn't. BUT, it was a tough one say time and time again for over 4 months. Meanwhile, as I said - her friends and family worked each day and didn't miss a housepayment, an electric bill, groceries for their family.
We work with other departments in the company and she slacks and waits for me to do most, if not all, of the work. If I am out a day, or vacation - she has to go to Corporate for help in doing the easiest of tasks because she hasn't got a clue what's going on. She spends her days on the phone with her husband, her kids (yeah, while they are supposed to be working), her sisters, etc. Email comes in with questions like "if x equals y and y is z, how do I go about making this happen?" -- her reply: yes. WTF??? It's a joke in the office that her standard respons in an email is yes, when that answer doesn't answer any question--question actually requires some thought and/or action. But, just yes. What happens then? They come to me for answers, problem solving. The 44 guys I work with nearly refuse to talk to her and they claim she is condescending and rushes them, won't listen. Her friends/family work directly with her so she can cover their mistakes and help them with the simplist of tasks, because I won't. I have zero tolerance for a grown man who is given specific instructions on Tuesday and Wednesday morning asks "what am I supposed to be doing today?" -- my answer each and every time is to be responsible for yourself and get organized enough to be a professional. They walk away, looking for her (maybe she's in a meeting, etc) hoping she will come to the rescue .. once again.
We worked with a girl who would make mistakes and then refuse to admit she did anything wrong. That's crap. When I screw up, I'm the first one to say oh no, how am I going to fix this? There is no harm in admitting a mistake as long as it doesn't happen every time you do something. Anyway, the boss lady and I used to vent to each other the same thing I just said. Admit the mistake and move on -- don't try to cover it up or blame someone else. With enough griping, finally mgmt did something about this particular girl.
Well .. guess who now screws up alot and blames other people? Yep, you guessed it - my fearless leader. That was the last straw. I used to truly like her (even though she's always been a pain in the a$$) and we were really close for a long time. I can't respect her anymore. She's turned into someone I don't even know. I believe she's intimidated by me, my knowledge, my relationship with the rest of the guys. I think she thinks I want her job -- I don't. I have a job and perfectly comfortable doing what I do now, I don't need or want the responsibility of being a manager. I've said this to her -- she knows.
How do you work with someone who is nosey? (as in eavesdrops conversations <you can't keep much quiet in a cubicle> and then has the ball$ to ask a question about the conversation? Jumping and running over "who did that", "are you kidding, that happened?", WTF? is nothing private? I know she can hear me, but have some respect. If I wanted her to know, I would have told her myself. I had a visit to ER 60 days ago, nothing major. Guess who showed up there? Guess who stayed for the Dr to come in and diagnose? Guess who refused to step out of the room when he did? I was sick, truly sick (which is why I was there) and didn't have the energy (or the guts maybe) to ask her to leave. I thanked her for coming several times and told her I'd be into work the next day and said I'll see you later -- isn't that a hint to get the hell out? And this is in the name of concern on her part. BS, there is no real and genuine concern - she's nosey. One of her sons told me once "we don't call her the drama mama for nothing" -- how true. Since he said that, I've paid particular attention and he is so right. If there is no drama, she creates her own.
Everyday she complains: her stomach, her hyatel hernia, her IBS, her this - her that. EVERY DAY! I'm not the only one who hates this. I get comments from other people in our department (yeah, they come to me always, why - I don't know) and make comments about someday she will come to work and have nothing to complain about. Don't bank on that, I say.
Every quarter, we have a meeting where the company tells us how the company is doing overall. Just guess who gets all the credit for the $$ made in our department? Now, I'm not pompous enough to say or think that I am responsible for every dollar made, but I know I've brought in quite a bit of revenue for the dept and the company. Do you think at any time she would share any credit for our accomplishments? Not once.
I am sick and tired of this each and every day. Like I said, it started off good - then I noticed her slipping - today, we're at the point that I just want to shake her and say "Get your head out of your a$$ and stop being the person we used to talk about!".
I've gone to her bosses and explained the favoritism, her harsh criticism of other people in the workplace, etc. While, of course, they listened - no action was taken. I've gotten to the point where I tell other guys the BS that goes on that affects their paycheck. I can lose my job over that. What each guy is doing work-wise is pretty confidential. I tell them, go to the back office - let them know what's going on. Out of 44 guys, less than 1/2 of them have the ball$ to say anything about her. Just b*tch to me about it.
I've had it!! I have to go again today and deal with this crap. I'm tired of fixing her mistakes. I'm tired of her friends/family getting the prime work. I'm tired of doing everything while she rakes in the bonus checks and takes the credit. I'm tired of her lies. I'm tired of her fake concern. I'm tired of her nosing into my business. I'm friggin' tired.
Well .... I don't feel any better, but at least I got this off my chest. There isn't anything I'm willing to do -- this job is 20 minutes from home and jobs in this particular industry are tight, so I'm kinda stuck. I guess I will suck it up and do it again today. One day at a time ....
I just want to scream.