What Do I Do?

Pre T Pre top surgery.... Just feeling really down lately... I have come out to a few people... The only people that really matter, mom grandma and my beautiful girlfriend of almost a year.
they're all very supportive but sometime not sensitive and I know I can't expect them to ***** foot around me but it hurts when they say things that categorize me a female... I mean ya I was born female but I never felt female NEVER... I often wonder why.? And how? Why couldn't I just of been born a guy? Or how did someone screw me up so bad?
Idk it just feels like such an impossible thing transitioning.... It's hard enough finding a counselor... Let alone picturing my life after my journey i want this so bad I can taste it.
I would give anything for this, everyone says take your time, or talk it through because you might not want this... Why doesn't anyone get for 18 years I've known this is what I wanted I have never been so sure of anything in my life.... I wonder can I get T without a therapists? And can I go to a enorologist idk how to spEll. It and get blood work without seeing a therapist? Idk but I feel like everything closing in...
Waterbottle1993 Waterbottle1993
18-21, M
2 Responses Jan 11, 2011

Oh I know lol but damn in my area it's hard even finding a therapist who deals with GID idk just kinda feels so far away I'm too impatient

I believe it is possible, though not probable, that an endocrinologist would help you without a letter from a therapist. To my understanding, it only takes about 3 months of counseling according to the Standards of Care. I know that can feel like an eternity when you're waiting to transition. I, too, am waiting, but trust me, it feels so good to take matters into your own hands and do what is right for you.