Letting It Outwell ,im falling in love with a good friend.... i don't know what to do. in a way, i want to let him know how i feel.. but thats always hard.
the feeling of getting rejected and never seeing him again. and i know that everything takes time but sometimes i can't stand it. I've heard the saying that if he's a real friend, then he'll understand. maybe he will maybe he won't. people are wierd. when i first came out to people, they said that i'm confused and i don't know who i am.. but i know exactly who i am and how i feel. i want to be with him forever but i don't want to lose a friendship. we talk about everything together, hang out all the time. and sometimes i feel like he knows me more than my family does even though he doesn't know that im gay.
i wish these things weren't so damn complicated.
i know he's straight and i wish he wasn't. but maybe i'm just greedy. i respect him and his feelings so thats why i don't want to let him know. i remember everyone's reaction when i told them i was gay. it always surprised them. sometimes they laughed, denied it, or didn't really care.
or they would say "i know my brother isn't gay", "how do you know your gay", and its hurtful. i don't want to go through that again. i wish they would just know.
i have really good friends who understand me. most of them know that i'm gay and it doesn't bother them anybit. and sometimes they would even joke about it. but i've also heard stories of how people get beat up and even die for the way they are. one of my best friend told me that it doesn't matter if im gay or not because its not him so it doesn't matter. i wish more people would think like that.. well i don't really know where im going with this story but i've heard this is the place to let it all out... thanks jimmdean001
well thinks for reading