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Gay? Yeah, That's Me

A lot of gay people have said that if they could choose, they'd choose to be straight. Being gay is hard. Yeah, it's hard. But I bet that being straight is. I'm happy just as I am ... If I could choose, I'd choose to stay gay.
jayt76 jayt76 31-35, M 46 Responses Oct 6, 2006

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Much hugs to Shufflemuffle, who sounds like he's been going through some really hard stuff. I hope things have gotten better since you wrote that comment those years ago.

I'm glad you are proud of who you really are.. Both sides do face difficulties, but as a closeted me, I think being gay is harder in finding love..

This is question that everyone can evaluate in their own context! <br />
The facts that are surrounding gay people are not the same in all situations and areas so someone could say (maybe my situation) that I would prefer to be straight because being gay in my country is very controversal with the conservative ideals that my society has about homosexuality.<br />
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In all cases though it is not a choice to take, so whatever is the answer we must live by it! And because Love (as other said here) is for all, that means for all is hard wither way!

Being gay is way more fun than being straight! We get rainbows!

Hey phoenix666, it's never EASY, even if it sounds like it. The best we can hope for is to, first, be true to our own feelings and what we know for ourselves is truth; and second, to trust that someday, we will find that peace and contentment that comes with making the right choices in life. I can tell you one thing: you will NOT feel any better -- worse, in fact, even though you make think it's not possible -- by denying who you are. So even though you may read my experience above and wish you had it as easy as I do.... you must realize that I didn't come to that feeling of contentment and peace overnight. It is something that takes time, hard work, and a lot of loving yourself. But it's entirely worth it. YOU are worth it!

i wish it was that easy 4 me...

i love being gay, i never thought of being stright, thats nasty lol

@Aminik -- Well said. :) Relationships are always hard because it's not just about one person but about two people. (Or, I guess, more than that sometimes, depending on the relationship.) We can't control the other person, and that's what makes it so hard.

@redholly -- It makes me mad, too... But it's an investment. Previous generations fought even harder than my generation does, so that I can enjoy a little more freedom and equality. I fight, though, so that future generations will be a little more equal and a little more free.<br />
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@journeyfulloflaughter -- Trying to find love is definitely hard, and I think it probably is no matter who or what you are, whether that's gay or straight, human or unicorn. ;-)

You should be who you are! Straight or gay, relationships are way hard! Unfortunately gay relationships get more crap then others and for the ones that last for so long its wonderful because you are dealing with much more than a straight relationship!

i'm glad that you value who you are :) <br />
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and yes, being straight is hard, i can testify to it. i imagine being gay is hard too. really, trying to find love is hard.

Thanks marieceleste35. While I don't think that whom we are attracted to is a matter of choice, how we deal with it certainly is: We can accept it or we can run from it. Sounds like Melsafurse could use a friend, too.

Melsafurse -- I think that we each have to define ourselves. Whether you call yourself straight, bicurious, "straight but," or whatever, that's up to you. Your attraction to others is personal and not a matter of debate for others. Some bicurious people I've known have eventually made the leap into defining themselves as gay. Others have realized that they were actually straight after all. Often, it actually does take a real experience or at least the prospect of an experience to help bring that definition into focus.

I'm not happy with who I am. It's not a choice at all and the whole thing has been eating away at me since I was 12.

Once you come to terms with who you are and learn what is truly going to make you happy, you'll be at peace. Trust me, when you come out, it's definitely a freeing experience. You don't have to hate yourself anymore. My friends absolutely surprised me and I can talk to them about all of that stuff now. So no worries dude/dudette (lol) there are better things on the horizon.

It's very important to yourself, that you accept yourself as you are. My own mother is THOROUGHLY convinced that I made my own CHOICE to be gay. This has led to MANY arguments and discord. She is so stubborn to believe that she knows more than someone else, even her own son, and furthermore refuses to believe anything I tell her! Believe me this has caused me much grief, and even had me questioning myself. It wasn't until I found this website, and read the accounts of other people stating the same thing, that I finally began to realize all along that I had no more of a choice in my sexual preference, than anyone else does! Needless to say, my mother has still taken the "hard line" and she and I are not on speaking terms. I just cannot understand how she does not even value anything I say on this issue, it's quite sad, and she has "lost" me as a son. I hope you do not go through what I am going through. I dare say that if I had a choice in my sexuality, it would be to be straight or at least bi. There are only a small percentage of gay people available, and it makes finding a long-term partner very difficult.
Anyone, please feel free to comment back to me direct.....

If I wasn't gay, I wouldn't have a relationship with a wonderful woman. So I'm happy.

yyyeahh! Go you :) I had that struggle with my ex, she was all like "I hope I'm straight for uni" I was like: ******* IT! Your wonderful whatever you are! :P <br />
xxx