Figuring Out Who I Am

Hey Everyone,

I've just recently discovered that I am gay within the past year. I had always been a little curious, but never knew if I was really attracted to men. Well I had talked with one of my best friends who is gay, and he told me there really is only one way to find out, kiss a guy. Haha if he had only knew how literal his advice was.

It was a summer night in June 2009, just after graduation. I had invtd some friends over from my high school and we had a bonfire, smores, and yes a little drinking. I know that its illegal, but I was in high school and made my decision, as well as stick by it. Well after my parents went to be we began a couple short games like hide-n-seek. Then after we started drinking, someone said we should play truth or dare. Everyone, including myself, agreed so the game was on. Well it started out all PG, like run around the house in your underwear/do some impossible task. Well, after a while we started daring eachother, in our little group of 10, to kiss someone. Eventually it came to my turn and I was dared to kiss my best friend....I was a little awkward about it as i had only kissed girls before. But he was a little tipsy and just told me to relax, close my eyes, and he would do the work. Well it worked =) I never knew the meaning of sparks flying until then. It was like a rush had overcome me, I had never had a kiss like this before.

I didnt do the whole fall in love with him, thats not my style. Even if, it wouldn't have worked out because he has a boyfriend who I am also friends with. I'm very happy for them and wish I could be so lucky. I'm greatful for this experience as it helped me discover who I am. Not who I thought I was. Unfortunately in my travels I ended up with one guy, but he just used me as a rebound until someone better came along. However, thats a whole nother story. But to all of those who ar unsure or wonder, but think it wont work. Just try, no harm in trying. It doesnt have to be at a party, or while intoxicated. Just ask a good friend to help you out or to set you up with someone who knows its not a garaunteed commitment.

Anyways I'll be friends with anyone who wants to be friends with me. I need some gay guy friends, not necessarily for dating but just to talk to.  Of course i dont discriminate and will be friends with everyone, straight/gay, girl/ boy.

Thanks Everyone

Chat me up anytime =)

tc67912 tc67912
18-21, M
6 Responses Mar 2, 2010

im young so i dnt rly know any gay guys but im sure im gay

thanks BlasphemousAngel, ik theres the right guy out ther somewhere, and I cant wait to find him.

I loved your story, I'm sorry that your first BF had to be such a jerk just using you as a rebound. I hope you'll find someone great when the time is right

I remember kissing a guy for the first time...I was struck, even back then when I was a naive little boy and didn't know from shine-ola, by how natural it felt to me, like I had just found my home. I remember thinking "This is what I'm supposed to be doing."<br />
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I'm glad your experience was so postive, tc. And like yourself, I'm open to friends who come in all sorts of packaging, so feel free to hit me up.

haha i found it kind of shocking. i had always wondered about being with a guy, but prolly never wouldve kissed one if this didnt happen. I found it opened a new world to me and i was kind of scared at first, but now that my friends have helped me and ive dated a guy, im comfortable. its like where i belong. if you want you may add me as a friend and i can answer any questions you may have?

Hey dude ok so when you found out you were gay did u found it shocking or where you looking forward to liking guys how was your reaction?