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My Story Seems So Little Compared To

My problems seem small compared to the other stories i have read on here. My husband left 1 month ago today. we have two children a 5yr old boy and 8yr old girl. he said he fell out of love with me. i found out after that his previous gambling problem started up again. i checked all my resources...no cheating, he never hit me or vice versa, we didnt even yell at eachother much. just grew apart. i feel like we could of fixed our problems if he didnt give up. i was hounding him to hurry a finish a test he needed for a really good job. the money was running out and now i know why. dont get me wrong there was a lot of resentments on both our parts. he still tries to hold on to his immature ways. while my life started circling more and more around our children and doing whats best for them. this is way simplified. but here is my question to you all. everything logically says i should and need to give up and i keep telling myself i have. i even took the initial leap and went to the laywer first. but my thoughts betray me. i gave him unconditional love...how to you turn that off? what he did to our family is terrible from my perspective so i just want my brain to stop trying to think of ways to fix what cant be fixed. it would be easier if i never had to see him again but with the kids we see or talk or text every day.
jesstj jesstj 36-40 1 Response Apr 9, 2012

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Separating or divorcing is big no matter what the issues are. So you shouldn't feel as though your problems are as big as others. To add young children to the mix makes things even more complicated.<br />
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I think what you're experiencing is normal. We have all had dealt with the challenges of trying to turn off what our brains are telling us. We struggle with wondering if we are doing the right thing. What could we have done differently to change things? But I think in most marriages, one person isn't REALLY given the option of saving the marriage. It seems like either one or both check out, or one or both do something that damages the marriage so much that there is no going back. <br />
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Try not to beat yourself up. Hang in there and let us know how you're doing now.