My Story. From Love To Betrayal

My name is Mandi. I am 25 years old, I have a 3 year old son and I recently filed for a divorce. I found out my husband has been lying and stealing from me as well as having a drug problem. I've known him since we were 15, fell in love at 17, had a baby at 20, married at 24, and less then a year of being married were getting a divorce. I have done everything in my power to help with his drug problem. I have him on my insurance and I've signed him up for Rehabs, and Addiction Therapy appointments. About 3 weeks ago after telling me he wants a divorce he took 300 dollars from my bank account and it was gone in 6 days. He didn't like that i had such control over the money but with his history i had no other choice. He swore he was clean and that he wanted to get better but the day after his therapy appointment he was out asking for drugs, thankfully i have friends that tell me about him asking around. I've realized that he is never going to change unless he wants to change and I can't force him to better himself. He is very verbally abusive and acts as if this doesn't hurt him at all and that's what hurts the most. Someone I gave my life to, my heart and soul to and spent the last 6 years with can just up and walk away from his family to be free, to spend money as he pleases, but mostly he wants to be able to do drugs without anyone telling him no. My entire family wants me to get out because he is just such a mean person. He does not do anything for me, literally. I do everything. I work 60 hours a week and still manage to come home cook, clean, do laundry and make sure my son is fed and bathed. Im just so drained. I know i can do better, and i know there are so many great guys out there that will put me first and love me for me its just so hard. I feel like because im not a super model that i cant get anyone better then him. That guys want girls with nice bodies, and not girls with meat on their bones. Idk, its just me going through something i guess. I cant really sleep at night anymore Im up alot. I lost all motivation.

I am in GREAT need of some advise about this. Anyone else go through a divorce they feel like they were forced to do? I feel like the trust is so far broken that there is just no going back. I dont want to go back. I want a normal relationship, with kisses, and hugs and no lies or stealing.
Mandibee Mandibee
22-25, F
6 Responses Jan 16, 2013

My wife and I were both drug addicts and alcoholics for years. Four years ago I got clean and sober and she didnt. We've been together since 1972 and in a month our divorce will be finalized. Luckily the kids are all grown up,,,ages 39, 43 and 51. I didnt want the divorce and tried to fix our marriage, but my wife wouldnt do anything to help. So after 40 years, I'm single again. Through the program of AA, I have learned acceptance. it isnt easy and I have to work at it every day, but when I am able to accept things, it is easier to let go. You might consider going to ALANON...help and understanding is there

One more things, in my experience, most guys dont really care about a girl's body. They want someone to love and love them back...Life is not always easy, but you are young and your future stretches out ahead of you. I'm not special and if I can move on with my life at my age, you can move forward with yours....

I am sory sweetheart and from the looks I at least think you are very beautiful and think just like me there are gguys out there and they think more than past themselfs

I am sorry that you went through this. No one deserves to be hurt the way you were. Hope much happiness for you.

You deserve much better than this. I felt like I had to file for divorce due to abuse. I would have never wanted it but I know it is for the best. Keep your chin up and go one day at a time.

Thank you mgaj :) Im doing my best :)

I don't know about you, but I'd rather my child be around people who have their "stuff" together. I know what it's like to grow up with a verbally-abusive parent who has a drug problem, and it's a real struggle. I hear him in my head every day, talking about how ugly I am, how dumb I am, how fat I am. You deserve better than this guy, and so does your son. Also, I am 100% positive that you can and will find real love. Nevertheless, this guy obviously isn't it.

Thank you :) I agree. And im sorry about your past. Sounds terrible and im sorry you had to go through that :(

It sounds like you do need to move on from him don't let him bring you down. People on drugs tend to repeat this if they get of of it they fall back to doing it again . Don't take the chance move on you will find some one. This is a good place to express your self .please let us know how things go for you