I have told my husband twice now that I want a divorce. When we talk he seems to "get it" but then he seem to stick his head in the sand and pretends that everything is OK.
He makes "we" statements and future plans as in "we will do this next year".
It really bothers me. I am forced to keep the divorce low key as we have agreed not to tell my son until after the holidays. But in the mean time I feel snowballed.
I have started taking steps towards independence anyway. I opened my own bank account. Its a little step but now i have to make the bigger one - acknowledging the change and moving my pay deposit into this new account. Which means now i will have to be the one to bring up divorce again.
This makes me uncomfortable. He will say the thought everything was "OK" because we are not at each others throats. He will say he thought I had changed my mind. But he does not ask me if I have changed my mind.
The conversation will not progress into any kind of discussion about the divorce but he will explode (probably) in anger and find some way to call me names or insist that I dont care for our son because I want a divorce. He will tell me I am going to "ruin" our sons life and that I am selfish.
And once again I will be snow balled and there will have been no discussion about when or how or what. and each time I bring something new into the mix - the scene will repeat. New accusations maybe -but it will just repeat.