Ah , Life's Little Default Option

I tried hard to be a husband and loving father and did okay at the latter , sucked at the first . I tried hard to be what I thought was needed of me and either I was lacking in the necessary ingredients or my lackluster performance doomed me from day 1 . I hadn't realized how detached I'd become from who I am and after 10 years of a rollercaster marriage ,  several relocations , and a half dozen jobs , I'm falling back on who I was before all the changes began . Now I find myself older and wiser ( I hope ) , a father of 3 , and little the worse for wear . Letting go has been a real ***** ; much harder than it shoulda been , but that's my fault . I feel as if I just drove up a dead end highway convinced that road crews would pave the way before me , but no ! So , I bam back on the main road , changed , yet the same .

Tanengreen Tanengreen
36-40, M
Mar 7, 2010