Not very good at sharing my feelings I seem 2 hold things in. I can't anymore. I am embarresed 2 talk with my family, friends, even my pastor.feel like such a failure. My wife was everything 2 me my best friend, family. About 1 yr. Ago she said we were having problems & that I needed 2 communicate more & share my feelings. I new she was serious so ibegan going 2 counseling with her. She said it was helping a lot. She had already been in counseling 4 several yrs. 4 depression. She began taking medication,and about a month into it she began feeling better about herself & us . So she said we had been trying 2 have a child 4 a couple of years,but she had problems so we went to the doctors. He gave her some pills to help us. All seemd 2 be going well. Then one day I found out she was having an affair with someone at work. I told her I knew and was willing 2 work on our marriage she agreed. But wanted afew days 2 herself. When she came home she said she was leavingme not 4 this other man but to get herself 2gether. She began hanging out at bars and distancing herself from her family because as she said they were all on team J. I have been dealing with this pain for 6 trying 2 get it all outta my head.been going 2 church regularly.& praying daily. My mother & sis.inlaw have been helping me alot . They are still a big part of my life I have known them 4 over 20 years & are the only family I have. So the day after xmas I go 2 my inlaws because I new she would b ther on xmas & she still hasn't talkd 2 me in 6 mos. Askd 4 a divorce nothing. So after I give my inlaws all their gifts & visit awhile my sis. Nieces& nephews all left. My mother inlaw askd me 2 stay 4 a min. Then she told me my wife was 3 mos. Pregnant.I didn't no wat 2 say I was crushed my whole world caved in on me. I am so scared& emotional somthing I have never been. Thnx 4 listening just letting this out helps ..keep God first
36-40, M
4 Responses Jan 25, 2011

You are not alone. My ex began dating men in front of me and our two children as soon as I moved out. There is no pain quite like having the one person in the world who is closest to you slip away. I have found someone better and you will too!

Thank you for advice. I know child is not mine. And she wont spesk to me. Been tslking with my lawyer and decided to file snd move on. U appreciate your comments and once again thank you. Nice to know someonr is listening.

Well first of all you have to accept reality and to start some actions. You have to speak to your wife and find out what she wants. You have to find out if kid is yours too. After this answers you will have to consider other steps. The worst situation is when you don't know what is going on and seems like you're just in that situation. Hope you'll find the answers and as the situation gets clearer with the right moves you'll be back to normal life with or without her, Just, don't look at everything as a tragedy. This things are happening everywhere so just put your head up and be strong and with the support from your family i am sure you'll be ok.

Hey, keep your head up, what she does you can't control. I know how painful something like that could be, I have been trough a similar situation, I got to see the woman I loved being pregnant by another man its been so long and its still something that I could deal with. Now I'm going trough a divorce same women, she has left many times and every time it has been so painful. At the moment I'm just finding out from my kids that she's goin to sell her place and move In with her new boyfrien. Just a few months ago she had a different boyfriend move in with her so its has been a really difficult divorce for me and my kids. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. We all have to deal with the cobcequences of our decisions. Take care