My Life Is Spinning Out Of Control......

Hi, this is kind of weird for me as I am not one to really express my issues or complain a lot, but I just don't know what to do anymore. I have been living with a man (my husband) for almost 7 years now and we have 6 children between the two of us, plus one foster child. My husband hurt his back and has been living with this mind set that his life is worthless and nothing will ever get better. Like with any story there is a whole lot more then what I will be posting tonight. But anyways, through the last 3 years of taking care of him, the house, the kids and going through my own issues on top of it all, I"M TIRED! and I'm getting mad! I feel like I work my rear end off trying to keep this family together and all he does is sit and feel sorry for himself. Now, I have tried to talk to him about how I feel, I know communication is important, but we fight, I feel bad because I make him feel bad, and he thinks I deserve better and then nothing gets acomplished. Let me assure you, I have a wonderful man, a wonderful husband, but this man I live with now, I just don't know him, and I don't care for him very much at all. He's grumpy and moody, rude and sarcastic and most of the time, when he is interacting with us as a family, he is just making everyone misserable, including me! so here's the problem, my main problem........I am so angry and fed up with the way my life is right now, that I am a "you don't like it change it" kind of a girl, I'm trying really hard to avoid a divorce or seperation, I'm trying really hard to stay strong, but I'm becoming a bitter, angry person, and that is not who I am, not who I wanna be! I can't talk to anyone, I don't have "friends" most of my time is spent on my kids and husband that I don't have time for friends, but that's not the issue, and I can't talk to family because everyone thinks I should just leave and that he isn't hurt as bad as he says. So that's what brings me here. I need someone to talk to, someone to vent all my frustrations without people being personally involved.

kguyette5 kguyette5
May 15, 2012