2 Year Struggle?

I met her two years ago. She was so loving and caring. Basicley perfect for the honey moon months. We would fight a lot and it would get bad. She would get physical and I would take it. She knew how to push my buttons and she did one day. Breaking stuff hitting me and saying stuff to get under my skin. I snapped got physical back. I didn't hit her but sure enough she called the cops and I went to jail. Court order a restraining order which I planned on obeying without a doubt.The next day I was released and three days later she calls and begs for me back. Regardless to say we worked it out and restraining order was dropped. We got in more fights after that but as soon as she started breaking stuff and trying to fight I would call the cops. The cops been at here two times after I was arrested. The police started to realize it wasn't me and try and convince me that i need to leave her and never go back cause she is crazy.. One of the times I requested her mom to come over and come in so I had a witness i wasn't putting a hand on her while she was packing her stuff. My girlfriend scratched her face bloody and claimed I hit her. The police came talked to her mom and realize I was the victim and not her. They realize she was lying cause her scars where scratches and not a punch like she claimed. Even when the police ask her mother she even said I didn't put a hand on her. Embarrassing as it got to be when ever the police came they knew it wasn't me. Two years of this but yet we always worked it out and could never let go. Every time I tried she knew how to draw me back in. Every time she leave I miss her and try and get her back. I never understood this. We both were in a terrible situation but I loved her unconditionally and I believe she loved me the same too. Never gave up hope but probley should of a long time ago. Things did get better. Until the last month or so. We would go back and forth and her mom told me this is crazy. I love my daugter I know you knoiw she is crazy so accept it and stop going back and forth. Needless to say a week later I find myself alone without her. This time for good. We all went out before Thanksgiving that night I seen her exchange info with another guy question her and she denied it. Long story short I spend Thanksgiving alone Friday hang with her than never hear from her again. Well very rare. I question her she claims she is lost and confused Blah Blah Blah. I'm not stupid and now I finally got it out of her yesterday. Says she not in love with me, want me to move on and she is happy. Yes she is with this guy now. I know its for the better, I know it will take time. Two years good and bad I accepted it cause I was stupidly in love. I find myself struggling at time and missing her, But why? Why should I miss anything or anyone that would do this to me? To me she just met this guy ,He is saying all the right things ,Playing on her weaknesses and vulnerability. She claims he could be the one she already loves him after 2-3 days. Whatever I hope it is true cause even thou I love her if its better for her than so be it. What I worry about is not getting over her and if in a month she realizes he is just preying on the weak and he is not what she thinks and calls me. I'm screwed. Even thou its been rough and dysfunctional I love her or do I love having her there and the dreams we shared because now without her I have no plans,no future, no one around. Is this what I am truely having a hard time with or just not having her with me.
badazb badazb
31-35
1 Response Dec 2, 2012

she isn't worth it, if she loved you she wouldnt try to control you, she want to control everything you do thats why she pushes your buttons constantley even when a child is involved take notes on who begin each agurement and try to stay calm eventually youre going to see a pattern.