We Know It's Time...

Somehow my username and password have been screwed up, so Confusious13 is now Confusious14.

My wife and I met when I was 18 and a freshman in college. I fell in love with her instantly. A great story, but some other time. Anyways, she graduated junior college and followed me to a FU college. She's the only reason I made it through. A long 6 years supporting one another. Finished my graduate degree and was working as a long-term sub (she as nurse). Had a beautiful wedding. Got our first house. Fixed it up. Got a full-time teaching and nursing jobs. Starting trying for children. Took a bit, but finally happened. Almost 20 years of being together... Both love our kids. Love our house. Still love and care for one another. Just don't like each other a lot of the time. Living in the same house, but that's about it. We're different people now. We are just so confused on what to do? What's best? Why does separating have to be a bad thing. We both still care for one another and want what's best for one another. We worked so hard to get where we are and with what we have. Blessed. Don't want to mess that up. I want passion. We've lost ours and we both know it. I want someone to want me as much as I want them. Plain and simple. I need that feeling again. I could go on and on and .....
Confusious14 Confusious14
36-40, M
2 Responses Dec 12, 2012

Mate....my take is that you can save this marriage. Go to counselling, go on a holiday together, create more unforgettable memories like your wedding by going to Venice or Paris or South Africe or some place so weird and special no one can take that away from the two of you. The grass is not greener mate. Yes there is happiness on this side of the fence, but its bloody painful to get to it. Try you damndest to make it work. You will never wake up to another person like your wife. Never. R

If you want passion, create passion. Do you honestly think that you are going to go out and find someone else that is going to have so much passion for you and you for them that it will last the rest of your life? Chances are pretty good that you will enter into a new relationship, it will be fireworks and hot, steamy sex, and over time you will end up with exactly what you have. Passion is something that comes naturally in the beginning, but must be cultivated over time in order to ensure it lasts. My advice to you is to remember the person you married, remember how it was (you said it was a great story), and recreate that. Sweep her off her feet. Be the catalyst in creating the fire that once burned so naturally for you. There is truth in the saying that the grass is not greener on the other side. If your grass is withered and brown, water it. Don't dig it up and replant. You never know if the seed will take.