Sometimes You Need A Reality Check

So my boyfriend and I were emailing back and forth while at work and we got into...I guess you could call it argument or misunderstanding. The conversation turned towards working out. I told him how I'm going to get a personal trainer next semester since I'll be needing it for when I join the Navy Nurse Corps.
He replied saying he would rather that I have a girl personal trainer. Id be paying a guy to check me out and work out with me when he wished that was something he could do.
This made no sense to me. Why should it matter? I've been 100% faithful for the past year and ten months, I constantly show him how much he means to me, I tell him I love you a million times a day. Do you really think everything is all going to change if when a chick isn't available at my gym that I have a guy personal trainer? So I told him he was being overprotective.

Right after I sent that "overprotective" text a customer walked up. (I work at a gelati shop). I knew right away he was a veteran, he was wearing a Wounded Warrier hat and he was eyeing my boyfriend's dog tags. We ended up striking up a conversation. He had been in the army for twenty seven years, special forces, and had spent a lot of time talking with military wives and girlfriends on how to support their loved one while deployed. He said the biggest mistake that girlfirends/wives/ fiances make is either talking too much or not enough. He spoke of one Army wife who always was so busy that she barely emailed her husband while he was away. He spoke of girlfriends who vented about the stress of their lives so much without thinking about how that stress would impact their soldier or Marine's welfare. He had seen a fellow soldier get mentally distracted for one second, which lead to him getting hurt. Basically he said the best thing we can do is to support our men is remind them how much we love them and keep in mind how our actions affect them even when they're across the world. So many deployed men (and women) get dumped, cheated on and left over there that we just need to remind them that we're not "those girls".

I instantly felt so stupid for calling him overprotective. If it gave him peace of mind and better allowed him to focus on staying safe and what's important, than a simple thing like finding that one girl personal trainer would be the right thing to do. Needless to say we talked it out and both apologized for our parts. But I'm just so thankful for that customer that just brought me back to reality for those few moments :)
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4 Responses Nov 22, 2011

Thank u for this post

Wow. Thank you so much for sharing this story. I definitely needed this...

Thank you for posting this, it really helped, I'm just trying to figure out that fine line between talking too much and not enough...

Thank you for posting this. I need a swift kick in the butt - going through some emotional crap since my Soldier was deployed, and have been feeling very neglected and taken for granted. My first deployment, feeling lost. With no resources for girlfriends of Soldiers, I thank you again for posting on this site!