My First Entry

July 14, 2010
                                                                    
Today is guess is the first day of my new and improved healthy lifestyle. I figured that since i never follow through with any real fitness regiman, i would start a journal or blog of my experience so i basically have to follow through.
Let me start off by saying that I am not thinking that weight loss is going to be my key to happiness. I am trying to improve myself as a whole and find out what completes me and what makes me truly happy. right now....i am so totally far from being happy (with myself that is). my boyfriend asks me all the time what happened to the confident independant woman he fell in love with? well....that girl was more fit which led to me being wayyy more confident, i had a great social life and could have cared less about having a serious boyfriend. once i met my boyfriend, my two best girlfriends also found serious boyfriends and we kind of all just drifted apart. That was when that confiedent independant girl i loved being started to fade....I started eating out like crazy and drinking unhealthy amounts of soda and sugary drinks. I usually ate two meals because at this time i was living at home and would eat dinner with the fam then go to my bfs house and pick up some fast food for him.....and myself. I gained weight quickly and eventually became lazy, never working out but eating whatever i wanted. I started focusing more on my relationship and constantly trying to make sure my man was happy that i completely ignored myself. Everytime i looked at myself in the mirror, i could see the pain on my face when my favorite clubwear no longer looked cute but as if it were a overstuffed sausage. I realized that i would try on at least three outfits before leaving the house everyday and everytime i would think to myself "im a F&$%#@ Fat A$$" or "when did i get this fat?". 
I am tired of looking at this unhappy me. Im tired of not being healthy and not caring about myself to look my absolute best. This day is the day of change for me. I am committing to making myself happy. I am starting a fresh relationship with myself and am going to do everything in my power to succeed.
My inspirational quote for this journey:
Happiness is enhanced by others but does not depend upon others- Anon


Happy Healthy Living!
HMA
hmadrida hmadrida
22-25, F
Jul 14, 2010